[project168 - simon & garfunkel] [lyrics: russo/peekyblinder(rose&fox)2026] Uncle mike, he's got a mate, he drinks with down the pub say's that Carl can get the lot, from guns to fags and grub I remember once he sold me a twenty-four carat ring the gold came off in minutes and my finger turned all green. Carl's a wee bit mental, always carries a pillow case Now if you ask politely he'll open it to your face In disbelief I peeked inside concerned at what I see Where the fuck is that from? Is that legal in this country? 'What is it?' i said 'a Horned Dragon!' he says. 'is it still alive?' 'of course it is, the pillow case it helps it to survive. You can have her for a one-er but you'll have to buy a tank she might also have a tick or two.' i had to say 'no thanks!' Last I heard, Carl got Mike, to lend a little hand and in reciept of a job well done, Mike got a dobeman Aunty Vy went mental, she called mum on the phone three and a half hours later and she's still on having a moan So Mike's now breeding dobemans, he say's they're worth a bob all just so the lazy cunt don't have to get a job sold copied vhs's to his classmates back in school never had a proper job, he's selling stolen tools Right now he counts on dobermans, 'will she ever be in heat?' he moans towards my aunty Vy, watching coronation street 'don't know my love, now leave me be!' she shouts in dry reply 'but if we get stuck with puppies 'Michael!', you're balls are gonna fry!' Got a call, Bitch in heat, need all hands to the deck the stud yo! he can smell it, he knows its time for sex we close the door and giggle, just to give'em a little peace He's faster than the fox is, he was done in less than three. Turn's out Carl was pretty shrewd, playing the long con he's the only one in all of Bucks with a stud doberman. Charged two grand for three minutes work and a little bit of jizz looks to me like a pretty sweet bit of business that this is Two month's pass, boy that went fast, she's ready to drop the load six black pups, not much fuss, Vy says 'now go offload!' sold one to Bully, two to Foz, another to gay Stephen 500 a piece, I can't believe, Mikes now breaking even! Then Merry Christmas Rose and Fox, It came as no surprise he couldn't shift the last two, nor come clean to aunty Vy take these two, I beg of you, to save you're favourite uncle So we took two little doberman pups, called 'em simon and garfunkel.
