What My Body Remembers

This is the more contemporary version I chose to publish. However, the version that made me shed a tear is the quieter one linked here: https://suno.com/song/eff00023-cac0-4879-acc4-c569efeeab99 If you ever pop over, let me know in the comments, which one your prefer. -------------------------------------------------------------- I step out on the porch tonight The air’s a little sharp, a little kind My shoulders lean without asking why Like they’re still learning how to stand alone The light is low, the wood still creaks Every sound is where you used to be I pull my sleeves a little tight The way I did when you were close I don’t say your name But the night does I don’t reach out But my hands do It’s not my heart that calls you back It’s what my body remembers Where you fit, how you stayed How the quiet felt less heavy I tell myself you’re not coming home I say it like I’ve learned the lesson But every day My body remembers I pass the fireplace inside The room still holds that amber glow I swear the heat knows what we were Even when I don’t let myself go I look away, I keep it clean I keep the past in careful frames But some nights burn without a flame And I can’t tell my skin to forget I’ve packed away your clothes Like that means something I’ve learned new ways to breathe But not new reasons It’s not my heart that breaks in two It’s what my body remembers Where you lay, how you stayed How the night knew all our secrets I tell myself you’re not coming home I whisper it like a confession But every day My body remembers I take the same train every day I still glance up when the doors slide wide There’s a second where the world holds still Like it’s waiting for you to arrive I know better, I really do I’ve counted all the ways you’re gone But knowing isn’t moving on It’s just standing where we were If I let go of the way you felt Would that mean I let go of you? If I learn to live without reaching Who am I proving this to? It’s not my heart that keeps you here It’s what my body remembers Every place, every shape Every moment we never questioned I know you’re not coming home I say it slow, I say it honest But some nights That’s not enough I’m trying to move forward I really am But love doesn’t leave All at once It lingers In what my body remembers