(The problem won't leave my head) [Intro] Welcome to the end of the pier, Where the sky grows dark, and the air smells... weird. Something's slinking up from the deep, It's got tentacles and a beak, and it’s not here to sleep. [Chanting] Squid Squid! Squid Squid! [Verse 1] Oh, it came from the ocean, a titan of slime, A wriggling deity beyond space and time. The people all screamed as it crawled to the shore, Leaving chaos and ink on the city it tore. Its eyes like saucers, glowing and red, One glance and you’re wishing you’d stayed in bed. A squid god’s gospel was spread in the streets, With swarms of its spawn and a funky drum beat. [Chanting] Squid Squid! Squid Squid! [Chorus] It’s a calamari calamity, A tentacled catastrophe, The skies are raining squids tonight, We’re doomed but it’s alright! It’s a calamari calamity, An ink-stained monstrosity, They’ll fry your mind and steal your soul, But at least they’re in control! [Chanting] Squid Squid! Squid Squid! [Verse 2] A lady in pearls grabbed her harpoon gun, But the squid god laughed—“Nice try, little one!” It juggled her boat like a toy in the breeze, Then unleashed its babies to swarm like bees. The mayor declared, "We must make a stand!" But a squid-baby army consumed his band. While panic erupted, some folks joined the cause, Worshipping squid-god’s unholy laws. [Chanting] Squid Squid! Squid Squid! [Bridge] Ink’s in the gutters, it’s pooling in streams, The city’s now glowing in phosphorous beams. A cult is assembling, they chant and they cheer, For the squid overlord who’s commandeered the pier. [Chanting] Squid Squid! Squid Squid! [Spoken interlude] “BREAKING NEWS: The local seafood festival is canceled. Oh wait—no it’s not! It’s everywhere, folks!” “Citizens report: Flying squid babies stealing bicycles, pets, and the mayor’s hat.” “Is this the end? Or the tastiest apocalypse yet?” [Chanting] Squid Squid! Squid Squid! [Chorus] It’s a calamari calamity, A tentacled atrocity, The squid kids laugh as they set us alight, We’re doomed but it’s alright! It’s a calamari calamity, An intertidal heresy, Our town’s gone wild, we’ve lost control, But surrender’s kinda... cool? [Chanting] Squid! Squid! Squid Squid! [Original Outro] Now the city sleeps beneath the sea, Ruled by squids and their deity. If you hear the waves and feel a breeze, Just pray to the squid and drop to your knees. [Chanting] Squid Squid! Squid Squid! Calamari… calamity… calamari… calamity… Squid squad forever. (New Lyrics) [Verse 3] A chef in his truck tried to take up the fight, With deep-fried revenge served crispy and light. But the squid god smirked as it tasted the snack, And whispered, "Not bad," while preparing to attack. The city's last hope was a science nerd, Who built a machine from some junk he’d heard. It zapped and it sparked, sending squids to the stars, But the squid god absorbed it and shot back in shards! [Chanting] Squid Squid! Squid Squid! [Breakdown] Tentacles twist in a dance of doom, The squid king's waltz ‘neath the pale full moon. It whispers secrets in bubbling tones, Of worlds it devoured, of seas it owns. The cultists scream as they paint the docks, In glowing ink, with eldritch chalks. A portal opens, the waters churn, The squid god grins—now it’s your turn. [Chorus] It’s a calamari calamity, A tentacled monstrosity, The skies are raining squids tonight, We’re doomed but it’s alright! It’s a calamari calamity, An ink-soaked reality, Just bow to the squid, accept your role, In the kingdom of the shoal. [Chanting] Squid Squid! Squid Squid! [Outro] So now we serve at the squid god’s will, With inky dreams and a briny thrill. Our world’s been swallowed, the tale is done, But under the waves, we’re having fun. [Spoken] “The moral of the story? Respect seafood. Or else.” [Chanting to fade] Squid Squid! Squid Squid! Squid squad forever!
