[Verse 1] Oh Captain Pete Hegseth took to the sea, With a spyglass eye and a certainty, Said “Any shadow that swims below Is narco steel and has to go!” [Chorus] 🎵 Oh ho, blow the horn and swing the line, Captain Pete’s on the briny brine! If it dives or drifts or barely floats, Pete Hegseth blowin’ up the boats! 🎵 [Verse 2] He cast his net where the waves ran deep, Said “That ripple there looks criminal to me,” The crew said “Sir, that’s a fishing trawl,” Pete said “Aye — the sneakiest kind of all!” [Chorus] 🎵 Oh ho, light the fuse and mark the chart, Pete don’t know one boat from another apart! Rowboat, buoy, whale or ghost, If it’s in the water, toast the coast! 🎵 [Verse 3] He sang of subs like sea-born kraken, “Silent steel that must be smitten!” But half the time what bobbed in sight Was old nets driftin’ home at night. [Chorus] 🎵 Oh ho, raise the flag and tell the tale, Another ‘victory’ in Pete’s logbook scrawl! No nets left, no fish, no boats, But Pete says “Clean sea!” as the smoke still floats 🎵 [Bridge] The compass spun, the maps were wrong, But Pete sang loud and carried on, For when you shout and point and boom, Every wave looks like your doom. [Verse 4] At port he’d boast of the foes he sank, With polished words and medals clank, While fishermen asked where their boats had been, Pete said “Collateral — we’ll talk again.” [Final Chorus] 🎵 Oh ho, pour the rum and sing it loud, Pete Hegseth’s proud, the crowd’s so proud! Narco subs or grandma’s skiff, If Peg was fishin’, he didn’t miss! 🎵 [Outro] Now the sea lies quiet, empty, bare, No fish, no boats, no one knows where, But Pete’s ashore with a grin and coat, Sayin’ “Hard to tell… they all looked like boats.”
