Unh! Yeah! Turn off the lights, turn up the funk! Straight out of the pine box! Check it out! Three hundred sixty-five days underground, In a tight wooden box, not a single sound. Counting down the hours, sleeping like a stone, Waiting for October so I can hit the zone! Halloween is coming, time to wake the dead, Shake off all the soil and the cobwebs in my head. This year I'm stepping out, single and free, Just a solo party zombie, happy as can be! 'Cause last year was a drama, last year was a mess, I brought a zombie girlfriend in a ruined wedding dress! I said, "Let's hit the dance floor!", she said, "Hold on, wait!" And that’s when the nightmare started to dictate! She had nothing to wear! (Nothing to wear!) Her shoes didn't fit! (Didn't fit at all!) Then the shoes matched her dress, but her lipstick wasn't legit! She looked in the mirror, started to cry, "Do I look pretty?" as an eyeball popped right out of her eye! I said, "Babe, calm down, you're a zombie, don't you see? The uglier you look, the hotter you're gonna be!" We were two hours late to the haunted house party, 'Cause she spent forty minutes trying to fix her decay. "Does this missing limb make my figure look big?" "Is my bone showing right through my synthetic wig?" I said, "Darling, you're rotting, you're fresh from the tomb! You don't need a stylist to enter the room!" But no, she needed gloss, she needed matching shade, While my ankles were crumbling and my patience decayed! Oh, last year was a drama, last year was a mess, Too much high fashion for a creature of distress! I said, "Let's eat some brains!", she said, "Are there gluten-free?" That was the final straw for me! She had nothing to wear! (Nothing to wear!) Her shoes didn't fit! (Didn't fit at all!) Then the shoes matched her dress, but her lipstick wasn't legit! She looked in the mirror, started to cry, "Do I look pretty?" as an eyeball popped right out of her eye! I said, "Babe, calm down, you're a zombie, don't you see? The uglier you look, the hotter you're gonna be!" So this Halloween... (yeah!) I'm rolling solo. No makeup bags. No drama. Just me, my dusty suit, and pure disco power! One, two, three, groovin' from the grave! She had nothing to wear! (Nothing to wear!) Her shoes didn't fit! (Didn't fit at all!) Then the shoes matched her dress, but her lipstick wasn't legit! She looked in the mirror, started to cry, "Do I look pretty?" as an eyeball popped right out of her eye! I said, "Babe, calm down, you're a zombie, don't you see? The uglier you look, the hotter you're gonna be!" Single zombie on the floor! No lipstick checks anymore! Horrible is gorgeous, terrifying is chic, Best Halloween party of the whole damn week! *Ugh... funky!*
