I bought a plant I keep forgetting to water It’s still alive, guess we’re both getting harder I laugh at jokes I don’t really believe in Say “I’m all good” like it’s something I mean My friends all talk like they’ve got it together I nod along like “yeah same, whatever” Got neon dreams but they flicker and stutter Like signs outside of a half-empty diner And if this is the highlight reel Why’s it feel like I’m buffering? Got a smile I can’t quite feel Guess I’m good at pretending I think I’m happy but I’m not sure Feels like I’ve felt this all before Like singing songs I don’t understand With somebody else’s band I say “it’s fine” like I always do Make it a joke so it’s less true Maybe it’s just getting colder I’ll probably figure it out when I’m older I got a job that sounds good at a party Pays just enough to feel kinda sorry Scrolling my life like it’s someone else’s Double-tap dreams, keep them on the shelves There’s a bar where they play all the old hits Everybody screams like they wrote it I mouth the words but I don’t really know why Feels like nostalgia I haven’t lived yet If this is what growing up is Why’s it feel like a rerun? Got a script I didn’t write Still I say all the right ones I think I’m happy but I’m not sure Feels like I’ve felt this all before Like singing songs I don’t understand With somebody else’s band I say “it’s fine” like I always do Make it a joke so it’s less true Maybe it’s just getting colder I’ll probably figure it out when I’m older Maybe I’m just tired Or maybe I’m just bored Or maybe I’m exactly what I tried to avoid Maybe it’s a phase Or maybe it’s the core Or maybe I’m the punchline I’ve been laughing at before And if I fake it long enough Will it finally feel real? Or is this all there is Or just a demo reel? I think I’m happy but I’m not sure Turn it up louder, ignore ignore Drive all night with the windows down Let the silence drown I say “it’s fine” like I always do But the joke’s getting old, it’s true Maybe it’s just getting colder I’ll probably figure it out when I’m Older I think I’m happy… yeah, I’m not sure Guess that’s something
