Siri is a Glitch - Richmond+Black Bunnie by Black Bunnie

Yeah girl, I said “Take me to Dubai.”
Next thing I know I’m in Ohio.
Who coded this, my haters?

Yo, Siri got me stressin’ in silk robe at mornin'
Said “Take me to the tailor” she sent me home.
Asked for Dior, she heard “detour,”
Now I’m out here lost with a five-star snore.
Told her “gas station,” she pulled up graves
Said “Elon’s house,” she showed me caves
I’m yellin’ at my phone like it owes me rent —
She sent me to Tibet, I just wanted my jet!

Turn left? Nah, she flex wrong,
I’m in bumper cars singin’ “Where’d I go wrong?”
Apple Maps smokin’ too strong,
Even my butler’s like “sir… that’s Hong Kong.”

Siri, you glitchin’, mixin’ up my mission,
Said “penthouse kitchen,” you heard “fiction,”
Now I’m lost in intermission!
Siri, you glitchin’, always contradictin’,
Rich in silicon, can’t take a hint, hun?
Reboot yourself, my run ain’t done!

She said, “Turn right,” I turned existential,
Now I’m deep in my mind like it’s residential.
Siri, you the reason my gas so mental,
Got me drivin’ through vibes that ain’t on rental.
GPS act like she drinkin’ gin,
Took a left turn straight to Berlin.
I said “Starbucks,” she said “Star cluster.”
Girl, NASA callin’, you cosmic blunder!

I’m like — where we goin’? she like “You’ll see.”
I’m lost in a cul-de-sac of A.I. dreams.
No cap, my map got split in seams,
She reroutin’ pain through my self-esteem.
Yo Siri, chill — that’s not my hood,
You calculatin’ wrong, misunderstood.
Your voice all sweet, but your math ain’t good —
You turned my route into false manhood.

Why you always guessin’, girl, not confessin’?
Every wrong turn feel like a lesson.
I said “location,” you said “vacation,”
Now I’m in Hell — with great reception.

Said “Beverly Hills,” she took me to the sticks,
Now I’m chillin’ with witches in designer kicks.
Search “fine dining,” she show me Popeyes,
Girl, what filter you usin’ on these lies?
Told her “text bae,” she texted my ex,
Now I’m facin’ lawsuits, emotional flex.
Autocorrect out here gaslightin’ kings,
Turned “love u” into “let's bring the rings.”

Hey Siri, what’s zero divided by zero?
It’s your sense of direction, baby.
Oh wait — she talkin’ back now!
“Would you like to send feedback?”
Girl, I am the feedback.

Siri, you glitchin’, got me in the ditches,
Said “Gulfstream jet,” I’m swimmin’ with fishes,
This ain’t yacht life — it’s Richmond glitches!
Siri, you glitchin’, lag so bad need fixin’!
Alexa chill, you the queen of assistin’,
Google… tell her she’s slippin’!

I’m uninstallin’ your ass tonight.
Alexa never did me like this.
Hey Google… she can’t drive for shiiiiit.

Hey wait, I thought we were going to Red Lobster!?
Dammit Siri...

2646/7500

Yeah girl, I said “Take me to Dubai.” Next thing I know I’m in Ohio. Who coded this, my haters? Yo, Siri got me stressin’ in silk robe at mornin' Said “Take me to the tailor” she sent me home. Asked for Dior, she heard “detour,” Now I’m out here lost with a five-star snore. Told her “gas station,” she pulled up graves Said “Elon’s house,” she showed me caves I’m yellin’ at my phone like it owes me rent — She sent me to Tibet, I just wanted my jet! Turn left? Nah, she flex wrong, I’m in bumper cars singin’ “Where’d I go wrong?” Apple Maps smokin’ too strong, Even my butler’s like “sir… that’s Hong Kong.” Siri, you glitchin’, mixin’ up my mission, Said “penthouse kitchen,” you heard “fiction,” Now I’m lost in intermission! Siri, you glitchin’, always contradictin’, Rich in silicon, can’t take a hint, hun? Reboot yourself, my run ain’t done! She said, “Turn right,” I turned existential, Now I’m deep in my mind like it’s residential. Siri, you the reason my gas so mental, Got me drivin’ through vibes that ain’t on rental. GPS act like she drinkin’ gin, Took a left turn straight to Berlin. I said “Starbucks,” she said “Star cluster.” Girl, NASA callin’, you cosmic blunder! I’m like — where we goin’? she like “You’ll see.” I’m lost in a cul-de-sac of A.I. dreams. No cap, my map got split in seams, She reroutin’ pain through my self-esteem. Yo Siri, chill — that’s not my hood, You calculatin’ wrong, misunderstood. Your voice all sweet, but your math ain’t good — You turned my route into false manhood. Why you always guessin’, girl, not confessin’? Every wrong turn feel like a lesson. I said “location,” you said “vacation,” Now I’m in Hell — with great reception. Said “Beverly Hills,” she took me to the sticks, Now I’m chillin’ with witches in designer kicks. Search “fine dining,” she show me Popeyes, Girl, what filter you usin’ on these lies? Told her “text bae,” she texted my ex, Now I’m facin’ lawsuits, emotional flex. Autocorrect out here gaslightin’ kings, Turned “love u” into “let's bring the rings.” Hey Siri, what’s zero divided by zero? It’s your sense of direction, baby. Oh wait — she talkin’ back now! “Would you like to send feedback?” Girl, I am the feedback. Siri, you glitchin’, got me in the ditches, Said “Gulfstream jet,” I’m swimmin’ with fishes, This ain’t yacht life — it’s Richmond glitches! Siri, you glitchin’, lag so bad need fixin’! Alexa chill, you the queen of assistin’, Google… tell her she’s slippin’! I’m uninstallin’ your ass tonight. Alexa never did me like this. Hey Google… she can’t drive for shiiiiit. Hey wait, I thought we were going to Red Lobster!? Dammit Siri...

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