[Synth Intro] Warning… pipeline pressure critical. Send in the Pipe Crusher. [Verse 1] Pixel herder by the light of day, Then 4 a.m. comes and she’s climbing away. Five times up Pipeline before breakfast was served, 9,044 meters because normal is absurd. She once stacked 2 million meters in a month, Or something so obscene that the numbers gave up. While everyone else fought for whatever remained, Emma crushed the pipe and buried the pain. [Chorus] Pipe Crusher! Queen of the climb! 50,001 meters and 145 hours of time. Pipe Crusher! Thirty days done! One final date with the rising sun. Run, hike, survive till the last watch beep, Then bury the Pipeline 6 feet deep! [Verse 2] No gherkins allowed, but she’ll eat every snack, With synthwave and 80s metal launching the attack. Her dog may be cooler, she freely admits, But the dog didn’t survive 30 days of this shit. “Anything but Pipeline” is her favourite route, Yet every time there’s vert, that’s where she heads out. She only left the couch to do something slowly, Now she’s 5.65 Everests above everybody. [Final Chorus] Pipe Crusher! One final climb! Day 31 and this is the last time. Pipe Crusher! Let the whole hill shake! 3,100 meters till the pipe finally breaks. Thirty days behind her, now finish the fight— Emma Rogers, crush that bastard one last time tonight! [Outro] Pipeline pressure… zero. Pipe… crushed
