Shops are shut, petrol station flowers are a scam I may be slightly tipsy but i've got a cunning plan its mothers day tomorrow so im taking them home we're stealing all the daffodils from london road mum woke up to a room full of daff's and a bunch of little bugs all over the gaff she was grateful for the effort and smiled at me till she found out where we gottem and her face turned angry The old girls are moaning in the village whatsapp group no more friendly chatter about baked breads and hot soups 'little naughty shits they always ruin everything' mum said "best thing is you hand yourselves in" blue rinse, they got their bloomers in a twist, off to apologize, take our slap on the wrist.
