Jasper Blue brand new paws dragging a floppy sock monkey chewing cotton stuffing clumsy young puppy stumbling on the bedroom carpet Ripping plushie cotton in the hallway running in a circle with the toy in your mouth tearing through the fabric wild little dog bouncing off the sofa in the house Tucking in your paws while I worked double shifts grinding till my knuckles turned raw overtime grinding debt load piling sixty hours working on the clock every week Heavy chest pressure sweating through the night struggling to pay the house bills drowning under debt load trying to keep a roof caught inside a tight financial vise Had to send you off to some friends for a stretch, gutted in my chest cavity, nowhere to go felt like a failure standing in the doorway watching you leave in the freezing snow Swallowed up in shame in a quiet empty house crying on the kitchen floor tile sitting in the dark at two in the morning calling out your name in total despair Wishing I could bring my puppy back home sitting on the tile losing my mind waiting for the day I could fix my life get back on my feet leave the stress behind Jasper Blue, waiting in the bedroom door Head resting heavy on your dog bed floor As soon as I walked in the bedroom space Tail hit the carpet, looking at my face Held down your room every single night Keeping my head straight, keeping me right Jasper Blue, waiting in the bedroom door Head resting heavy on your dog bed floor Then the turn came brought you right back home standing in the bedroom together glued to my hip whenever I was home waiting in your room till I walked through Greeting me at midnight tail wagging hard solid little presence in the bedroom curled up on your dog bed sleeping by my side while I tried to clear the dark gloom Licking up the kibble bowl clean begging for another bite fast hungry for more food loved your food constantly eating like a champ bowl clean in ten seconds flat Standing by my chair while I ate my dinner watching every single forkful go in nudging at my knee begging at the counter, appetite that never once slowed down Licking every single morsel off the tile, waiting on the carpet for another piece begging for a treat, hungry for a meal every single second of the day Years rolling past us on your dog bed grey hair creeping on your snout real slow watching you sleep while the seasons turned holding onto memories we built at home Then the sickness hit sneaky lumps under your jaw swollen in the neck out of nowhere lethargic on your dog bed losing your speed body turning frail swollen gland strain Lymphoma in the bloodstream spreading fast taking a heavy dark toll on your health terrified in the clinic waiting room holding your paw waiting on the doctor news Jasper Blue, waiting in the bedroom door Head resting heavy on your dog bed floor As soon as I walked in the bedroom space Tail hit the carpet, looking at my face Held down your room every single night Keeping my head straight, keeping me right Jasper Blue, waiting in the bedroom door Head resting heavy on your dog bed floor Late stage lymphoma terminal news hitting like a brick wall straight to the face doctor laying out facts on the table telling me chemo couldn't win this race He wouldn't even make it through the treatment anyway just toxic delay and misery spending thousands just to poison your body for a couple extra weeks looking bleak No real option no chemo cure putting you through hell wasn't right or pure and the alternative was horrific to imagine watching you suffer down the line Fluid in the lung, panic in the dark, suffocating slow, heart stopping short seizures on the floor, bleeding from the core, choking on the breath, trapped at the door Malignant systemic toxicosis, aggressive lymphatic cyanosis fluid in the chest cavity, choking in the night, suffocating in the dark, panicking in fear Refused to let you suffer through a sudden breakdown panicking in terror at the end chose mercy over misery a peaceful quiet end before the panic could hit Giving you a gentle exit with dignity sitting by your side while the doctor did it laying your heavy head down flat on my knee, stroking your soft fur real slow Whispering you're the best boy, thanking you for everything, gently letting you go watching the quiet breath leave your chest in the silence of the clinic room Holding onto your paw while you drifted off peacefully free from the doom I'll carry your memory inside my soul until the day they lay me down in the ground Yeah, rest easy Jasper Blue You were the best boy Always will be Good boy
