NDC Throwback Thursdays Genre: Ska Theme: Holiday Rush ▶️ Lyrics Oh I live in the suburbs in neat rows just for show Where inflatable Santas in the front yards all glow I dream of the perfect tree The presents The cheer But I'm filled with dread this time of year What the fuck I can't find the tape I burnt all the pies 'Cause a Christmas where nothing goes right is my demise What the fuck A cat with googly eyes is staring at me What the fuck Aunt Linda just grinned Said It’s Christmas you see I tried eggnog and carols I hung the mistletoe But my lights are all blinking in a violent strobe My uncle Dave just sighed as he sipped on his brew Your gravy's lumpy and what did you do to the yule log too What the fuck A reindeer on the lawn What the fuck It's eating my shrubs And now it's gone What the fuck I can't wrap this present I've used all my rage 'Cause a Christmas that's this chaotic is a gilded cage I tried online orders I tried peace and good will Even the fruitcake shuddered and gave me a chill The neighbors all whispered She's trying it's true What the fuck The cat’s in the tree The ham’s too dry What the fuck A battery died Now the singing snowman is screaming inside So I sit by the fire with a bottle of rum Watching a holiday movie that's painfully dumb I'll trade my lists for this drink My stress for a tune And mumble carols under a paper bag moon I'll drink and I'll nod 'cause that's all I can do A hopeless woman with the Holiday What The Fuck Blues What the fuck Did the dog just eat the ham And why is the tree now leaning like Sam What the fuck So here's to the houses with perfect serene light displays I'll toast to your calm with this glass in a daze Though I'll never be merry in the classic way I'm the ghost of Christmas Nope not today I tried Christmas spirit I really did try
