I chose the weight before I breathed Too many walls in one small life Hit them bleeding since I was a child No warm hands, no mirror that smiled I took the load, now the load takes me Crawling low where the mountains tease Why show the peaks when my knees won’t rise? Why give me eyes that only cry? Hey, You up There, why carve my freedom out? Why teach these bones the taste of doubt? Why lock me here in velvet chains Where silence screams my secret names? Give me a sign, a burning sign That this crawling still has spine Give me a sign, clear as starfire That I’m not just smoke in your choir I love this blood, this stubborn spark Yet you pull the thread in the dark I speak of summits from the mud They turn away, I turn to blood From the unbearable edge I stare At other mouths full of easy air Through self-pity’s silver rain Watching lives I’ll never claim Hey, You up There, why carve my freedom out? Why teach these bones the taste of doubt? Why lock me here in velvet chains Where silence screams my secret names? Give me a sign, a burning sign That this crawling still has spine Give me a sign, clear as starfire That I’m not just smoke in your choir I feel You breathing in the pause Grateful most days for this pulse But what’s the use of hidden light If no ear opens in the night? Why gift the mouth that no one hears? Why plant the seer in blinding years? So give me a sign Not gentle whisper, not kind disguise Give me a sign that tears the sky That my too-much life was no mistake That even the mud holds a golden lake Give me a sign, give me a sign I’m still alive Make it matter. Make it mine
