They said I had a cold, They said I had pneumonia, They said I got a hold Of a piece of bad bologna. But they was wrong, mama: It was the Momovirus. It was the Momovirus! Doc Wiseman dosed me with Azodyl, Saying it’s my kidneys, A white powder that tasted suspiciously like treaties. But he was wrong, so wrong. It turned out, it was the Momovirus. It was the Momovirus! (The Momovirus.) They tested me for feline leuk, They tested me for rabies, If I wasn't watching, they'd have tested me for babies. But one thing they didn't test, Cause there's none for cattus domesticus, (or anybody elsus) Was for the Momovirus. It was the Momovirus! It was the Momovirus! It was the Momovirus! It didn't matter that I ran a fever. It didn't matter that I chucked up hard. It didn't matter that I had Covid Toe on each of my polydactyl claws, But it doesn’t matter, mama, cause now I know, I have the Momovirus. I have the Momovirus. Will I get convalescent plasma From some lucky cat or hydroxychloroquine, that kills more than it cures? Or will I be a cavia porcellus for remdesivir? I don’t know if I’ll end up on a ventilator, if they have any to spare, and I don’t know if I’ll find myself in a large automobile out back of an underfunded Assisted Living Facility, or in a recovery room in Hotel California. Because I got the Momovirus. Because I got the Momovirus. I know I'm not the only cat, The only cat so cursed. I heard about a tiger at the San Diego zoo And I heard about a Georgia Persian Who was diagnosed with it too. We’ve got the Momovirus. We’ve got the Momovirus. Who did I catch it from? The cousin who wears his MAGA hat but refuses to wear a mask? or the lady at the pet food store, who found herself an essential worker in a literal deadend job? Cause he got the Momovirus, Cause she got the Momovirus, I got the Momovirus! --- [Lyrics by Mary K Swanson © 2025. All Rights Reserved.]
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