Vinne the Wormhole Chief (Rock ‘n’ LOL Edition)

(To the tune of a rock anthem version of “Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer”) Intro (Heavy Riffs): You know Drifters and Sleepers, And Ventures that explore, Gankers and loot ninjas, But Vinne settles the score—OH YEAH! Chorus (High Energy): Vinne the Wormhole Chief, Blows up ships with wicked flair, And if you cross his patrol, He’ll pod you without a care! Verse 1 (Punchy Beat): Dirtbags tried to cloak, Thought they’d warp away unseen, But Vinne laughed and said, “Nice fit, but it’s still a meme!” He bubbled up the exit, With drones and lasers bright, “Next time, bring some Quafe, punk, ‘Cause you won’t last the night!” Chorus (Rock It Hard): Vinne the Wormhole Chief, Keeps the void a sacred zone, But if you’re hauling contraband, He’ll make that loot his own! Guitar Solo (Face-Melting Awesomeness) Bridge (With Humor): Then one Starfrost evening, A dirtbag warped in bold, “Hey Chief, can I just pass through?” Vinne said, “LOL—NO!” Chorus (Turn It Up!): Vinne the Wormhole Chief, Podded that guy right away, Sent his clone mail with a bow, “Happy Starfrost, dirtbag, K!” Outro (Drum Rolls and Chuckles): So if you’re cloaked and sneaky, Or think you’ll steal some loot, Remember Vinne’s watching— And he’s got a Starfrost suit! Final Shout (Crowd Chant): “VINNE! VINNE! THE WORMHOLE KING! KEEP THAT VOID SAFE AND CLEAN!” (Cue firework explosions and a comically large wreck labeled “DIRTBAG” drifting past.)