There once lived a cow, strong and spry,

[Genre: Country | Tempo: Medium (90–100 bpm) | Vocal: Male, warm and slightly humorous | Instruments: Acoustic guitar, fiddle, upright bass, light percussion | Structure: intro – verse – verse – bridge – verse – outro | Add instrumental pauses between verses 4 and 5, and before the final moral verse | Outro: soft acoustic + fiddle fade-out] [Intro: acoustic guitar, light fiddle phrases] There once lived a cow, strong and spry, Gave ten full gallons, never dry. She stood with grace, her frame just right, A ribbon 'round her neck held tight. She dreamed, like many cows before, A bull who’d love her, nothing more. The bulls would gather, show off charm, And loiter round the milking farm. But when they saw her ribbon flair— They mooed: “Too plump! She needs some air!” “She’s got to slim,” they said, quite brash, “Or else she’ll never make a splash.” The cow just blinked. “Slim down for what? So ribs poke out and milk runs not? Sure, I’d like love, but I’m no fool— I won’t chase some vain, dumb-headed bull.” But all the herd went diet-crazy, Eyes glazed, their minds a little hazy. They all got worms and did their Zumba, At night they weighed in, chasing numbers. “Let’s weigh ourselves and cry some more!” “Forget the bulls — we need contour!” They dreamed of lips like Hollywood, But phenol baths did little good. And so the farmer made a choice— To turn those models into moist. [Instrumental break — soft fiddle + bass] But lo! Our cow with ribbon fine, Was matched with one who crossed the line. His eyes bloodshot, his horns were mean, He'd fight for her, a war machine! Why such devotion, all this fuss? The udder too… magnificent plus. [Outro: calm acoustic, slow fiddle swells] The moral here? Trends come and go, But chasing them just brings you woe. Stay true, stay kind, don’t change your soul— You’ll keep your guts — and reach your goal.