losing myself

[Intro: soft piano, whispered vocals, distant reverb, intimate and fragile] I keep losing myself in the moon silver teeth in a blackened room every shadow says my name but none of them sound like you [Verse 1: intimate R&B-metal vocal, piano and sub bass, restrained drums, breathy delivery / sung low building up with harmonies] I have been split by the hands that need me pulled apart by the voices I feed one wants blood, one wants mercy one wants the last clean piece of me I keep my ribs full of quiet thunder smile with the weight underneath say I’m fine while the floor falls under still giving air when I cannot breathe I can feel the tide in my body dragging my bones out of place I keep losing myself in the moonlight and calling the wreckage grace [Pre-Chorus: drums build, synth pads swell, tension rising, vocal grows stronger] Tell me, how do I hold the sky when every star wants a different side? How do I stay, how do I choose when every road leaves somebody bruised? I am stretched like a prayer gone thin barely skin over porcelain I keep reaching till my hands give out but I still hear them calling [Chorus: anthemic alt-metal / metalcore hook, guitars explode in, huge emotional belting, layered harmonies] I’m losing myself in the moon all of these tides are tearing me through I gave you the blood, the breath, the vow still I’m letting everyone down Pull me under, pull me apart leave your fingerprints inside my heart I tried to be holy, I tried to be whole but I keep breaking where nobody knows I’m losing myself in the moon and I don’t know who I’m coming back to I swear I’m trying, I swear it’s true but I’m letting everyone down [Verse 2: darker groove, electronic pulse, heavier bass, restrained guitars, wounded but controlled vocal] There is a version of me in the doorway one in the kitchen, one on her knees one keeps begging to be forgiven one bares her teeth just to feel clean I try to answer every ache try to carry every name but love gets heavy in the hands when everybody needs a flame I am not cruel, I am tired not gone, just harder to find I keep becoming what they require then wonder what used to be mine [Pre-Chorus: bigger drums, swelling synths, more urgency, vocal almost breaking] Tell me, how do I hold the sky when every star wants a different side? How do I stay, how do I choose when every road leaves somebody bruised? I am stretched like a prayer gone thin barely skin over porcelain I keep reaching till my hands give out but I still hear them calling [Chorus: bigger anthemic metalcore hook, full guitars, emotional belting, shouted backing vocals] I’m losing myself in the moon all of these tides are tearing me through I gave you the blood, the breath, the vow still I’m letting everyone down Pull me under, pull me apart leave your fingerprints inside my heart I tried to be holy, I tried to be whole but I keep breaking where nobody knows I’m losing myself in the moon and I don’t know who I’m coming back to I swear I’m trying, I swear it’s true but I’m letting everyone down [Bridge: stripped vocal and piano, vulnerable, tense, almost whispered] If I go quiet will you think I stopped caring? If I need space will you call it abandoning? I am still here under all this silver but the moon keeps pulling and I keep splintering [Breakdown: Drop A guitars, guttural screams, shouted gang vocals, massive half-time impact] Pull me north Pull me south Fill my lungs Then blame my mouth [Screamed] I CAN’T BE EVERYWHERE I CAN’T BE EVERYTHING I CAN’T BE EVERYONE’S GRAVITY [Screamed / gang vocals] I CAN’T BE EVERYWHERE I CAN’T BE EVERYTHING I CAN’T BE EVERYONE’S GRAVITY [Final Chorus: full band, layered harmonies, cinematic choir, huge emotional release, desperate belting] I’m losing myself in the moon all of these tides are tearing me through I gave you the blood, the breath, the vow still I’m letting everyone down Pull me under, pull me apart leave your fingerprints inside my heart I tried to be holy, I tried to be whole but I keep breaking where nobody knows I’m losing myself in the moon and I don’t know who I’m coming back to I swear I’m trying, I swear it’s true but I’m letting everyone down [Outro: piano fades into reverb, whispered vocal, soft and exhausted] I keep losing myself in the moon but maybe the moon knows my name maybe I’m not gone forever maybe I’m only changed