[Intro — spoken] Uh-huh, yeah One, two, three, four! Wait, am I muted? Slay. [Verse 1] Join the Zoom, big boom, I’m a little blurry My rizz is in the waiting room, my brain is in a hurry Chat says “hey,” I say “period,” my camera says “nope” I’m a pixelated baddie on a tiny little slope Blueberry, broccoli, Wi-Fi on a llama I got five tabs open and forgot my mama Wait, was that a question? I was mewing at the screen Now my boss is doing jazz hands in a filter made of beans [Pre-Chorus] Skibidi, skibidi, click on the link Ohio in my inbox and my laptop’s in sync Fanum tax my headset, tax my chair I said “I’m locked in”—I’m just sitting there [Chorus] Rizzler, rizzler, bling-bang-bloo Gyatt in the chat and a frog on Zoom Sigma, sigma, la-di-da My screen-share’s showing my grandma’s bra— Wait, no, it’s a sock, it’s a sock, okay I’m serving delulu in a PowerPoint way Tide Pod, Tide Pod, shiny little dome Do not eat the laundry soap, just leave it alone Skibidi, rizz, bop-bop-bop We’re the Zoom call queens and we cannot stop! [Verse 2] My mic went “brbrbr,” my face went “who?” I’m in a meeting with a dancing kangaroo “Can you share your screen?” I say “chat, is this real?” Then my desktop shows seventeen pictures of a seal Mewing, yapping, aura points go minus I got main-character energy and a spreadsheet behind us My internet said “brat,” then it vanished in a puff I’m giving CEO of absolutely no stuff [Pre-Chorus] Skibidi, skibidi, click on the link My brain’s doing cartwheels in a bathtub of ink Fanum tax my snack pack, tax my shoe I said “low-key focused”—I’m staring at a shoe [Chorus] Rizzler, rizzler, bling-bang-bloo Gyatt in the chat and a frog on Zoom Sigma, sigma, la-di-da My screen-share’s showing a dancing yak— Wait, that’s my wallpaper, okay, slay I’m serving delulu in a PowerPoint way Tide Pod, Tide Pod, shiny little dome Do not eat the laundry soap, just leave it alone Skibidi, rizz, bop-bop-bop We’re the Zoom call queens and we cannot stop! [Bridge — dramatic boy-band harmonies] Ooooh, I’m buffering Aaaah, I’m suffering My camera’s on, but my soul said “bye” I’m just a little JPEG in the corporate sky [Spoken] The pod goes in the washer. The snack goes in my mouth. That’s the whole tutorial. Thank you, chat. [Breakdown] Bing-bong, rizz-rizz, yip-yip-yap I put my lunch in the meeting chat Skibidi, bibbidi, zoom-zoom-zam My screen just turned into a picture of ham Aura, aura, minus three My own reflection just muted me No thoughts, head empty, the vibes are elite I’m doing the worm in a swivel-seat [Final Chorus] Rizzler, rizzler, bling-bang-bloo Gyatt in the chat and a frog on Zoom Sigma, sigma, la-di-da Everybody’s singing to a dancing llama We’re cringe, we’re iconic, we’re serving today We’re buffering hard in a fabulous way Tide Pod, Tide Pod, shiny little dome Do not eat the laundry soap, just leave it alone Skibidi, rizz, bop-bop-bop End the call, bestie—make the meeting stop! [Outro] Bye-bye, Zoom Bling-bang-bloo My Wi-Fi left And I left too Slay!
