[Verse 1: Silver-haired veteran rap male MC, unhurried, upright bass] Twenty-five years on the mic, I've heard every kind of speech But this man at the cookout had a sermon he could preach Said, "Anybody could make that, any kid could press a key Give me five minutes and a chair, I'd make a better one than he" So I took the studio key off of the ring right then and there Set it down beside his plate and said, "The room is yours, the chair Seven days, the whole setup, every speaker, every mic Come back Sunday, play me something, any style that you like" Yard got quiet, every head turned in a row He laughed a bit too loud and said, "Bet, watch the master go" [Hook: Silver-haired veteran rap male MC, smirking] Then do it, if it's so easy, here's the room Here's the key, here's the chair, here's a week to make a tune I'll be back on Sunday, play me what you made Then do it, big man, show me how it's played [Verse 2: Silver-haired veteran rap male MC, counting days] Monday night he posted pictures of the board with all the lights Tuesday asked me what a compressor does, and why it bites Wednesday nobody heard from him, Thursday he called me twice Asked me where the drums were kept and could I give him some advice Friday he unplugged my whole rack 'cause he swore he heard a hiss Saturday he texted, "Man, I never signed up for all this" Sunday morning, ten o'clock, he's on my step, his head hung low Hands me back the key and one file, forty seconds, nice and slow [Bridge: Silver-haired veteran rap male MC, tempo halving under the punchline] So I press play It's a doorbell Then a snare Then a cough Then a doorbell, then a snare, and he never shut it off Forty seconds, and I listened to it all the way through twice Then I looked him in the eye and said, "That's a doorbell. Real nice" [Hook: Silver-haired veteran rap male MC, smirking] Then do it, if it's so easy, here's the room Here's the key, here's the chair, here's a week to make a tune I'll be back on Sunday, play me what you made Then do it, big man, show me how it's played [Verse 3: Silver-haired veteran rap male MC, full weight] See, the easy stuff is easy till you're sitting in the chair Three a.m., the coffee's cold and there's nobody else there Every hook I ever kept, I wrote it twenty different ways Threw out nineteen, kept the one that walked out of the haze You can hate the way I make it, you can hate the way it sounds But you had my room for seven days and brought a doorbell back around So the next time at the cookout when you want to run your mouth Bring a song or bring a plate, and let the grown folks hash it out [Final Hook: Silver-haired veteran rap male MC, scratched cuts] Then do it, if it's so easy, here's the room Here's the key, here's the chair, here's a week to make a tune I'll be back on Sunday, play me what you made Then do it, big man, show me how it's played [Outro: Silver-haired veteran rap male MC, laughing] Ding dong Forty seconds Then do it [End]
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