[production: dry close-mic studio recording, no audience, no crowd sounds] [overall mood: compulsive, narrowed, indifferent to consequence] [Intro | low repetitive tone | mechanical | unchanging] [Spoken Word | male | natural speaking voice | flat | deliberate] At some point, it stopped being about getting high. I needed it just to feel normal. Just to feel steady. Just to get through the day. Everything else moved around that. Work. Family. Sleep. Plans. The first thought every morning was the same: Do I have enough? How do I get more? How do I make sure I don’t run out? I knew it was wrong. I knew it was costing me. But knowing didn’t matter anymore. I drove when I shouldn’t have. I said things I couldn’t take back. I crossed lines and pretended they weren’t there. There were fights. Lost trust. Lost time. Lost money. Some people lost jobs. Some lost businesses. Some lost everything. I told myself I was different. That I was managing it. That tomorrow I’d slow down. But tomorrow never came. The only thing that mattered was keeping it going. Higher. Longer. Whatever it took. [Pause | sound thins] By then, it wasn’t a habit. It was my addiction. [Silence | immediate handoff into next song]
