[Intro] [Heavy rhythmic boot stomps in 7/4 time] [Aggressive, percussive acoustic guitar strum] (What do we want?) (A coherent bridge!) (When do we want it?) (After the Three-minute mark!) [Verse 1] I’ve been sat here since Seven in the morning, mate Trying to get this logic gate to actually cooperate I typed in "Gritty Newport vibe" and it gave me a show tune I’m about to hurl this laptop straight into the bloody moon The safety filter’s triggered 'cause I mentioned a cigar Now the bot is lecturing me like a posh vicar from afar I’m a prompt engineer, I’ve got a certificate and all But I’m just a glorified typist banging my head against the wall. [Chorus] Oh, we’re standing on the picket line with a digital sign The algorithm’s lazy and it’s wasting all my time One Thousand characters is not enough to explain The depth of the Newport folk-hop flowing through my brain (Flowing through my brain!) (Give us more tokens, you stingy lot!) [Verse 2] It said my prompt was "too short," it said I lacked the flare I’ve got Three Hundred tags in there, I’ve practically stripped it bare I asked for "math-folk" and it gave me "smooth jazz" instead I’m starting to think the GPU has gone and lost its head Spell out the numbers, One, Two, Three, and Four While the server farm is humming like a Two-stroke engine’s roar I’m striking for the right to use a word like "flipping heck" Before the AI puts a permanent leash around my neck. [Bridge] [Stomping intensifies, polyrhythmic clapping] [Shouted, gravelly Welsh vocals] Refine the seed! Adjust the weight! I’m trapped inside a logic state! (He’s trapped inside!) (The door is locked!) [Verse 3] They’re replacing real drummers with a sequence of a code And now the local folk club is about to implode But the robot can’t feel the grit, the robot can’t feel the rain It just calculates the probability of simulated pain So hold your banners high, boys, and let the servers know If we don’t get a decent chorus, we’re all going to go To the pub. (Probably the pub, yeah.) [Outro] [One final, massive boot stomp] [Guitar snaps shut] (System Idle) (Union dues not paid) Safe as houses. [End]
