[Intro: Dry funky bassline, espresso machine steam hiss, Sharpie squeaking on paper] [Spoken, completely deadpan female voice] "Next in line. Oh. It's you. Give me a second, it's right on the tip of my tongue... Jordan? No... Jorbin. Definitely Jorkin." [Verse 1: Cool, deadpan spoken-sung female vocal] I know the mailman's golden doodle by his middle name I know the guy in the Patagonia vest who just came in from the rain I know that Evan gets an oat cortado, two pumps on the side Only met him yesterday, got his whole life classified Then you walk through the door at eight-oh-four and twelve seconds flat And my brain goes completely blank, imagine that! [Pre-Chorus: Handclaps and rising indie guitars] Got my black Sharpie uncapped, staring at your face Just another random customer I cannot seem to place! Wait a minute, don't tell me, let me take a guess— Is it Alex? Is it Taylor? Is it... Bench-Press?! [Chorus: Big catchy dance-punk hook, stacked female vocals] You're just so unforgettable—wait, I mean FORGETTABLE! Nothing 'bout the way you smile is remotely memorable! Order on the counter for a Sam! For a Morgan! Order on the counter for a Jorkin! A Gorgon! Pick up your cup, Amantha! Drink it while it's hot! How could I remember someone that I totally forgot?! [Funky Bass Breakdown & Sharpie Squeaks] [Spoken, deadpan female voice] "Sorry about that, Casey. I meant Kaysadeeya. My bad, Quimby. Here's a free croissant... you. The baker made too many." [Verse 2: Deadpan female vocal, rhythmic and punchy] Why would I notice that you wore that jacket on a Tuesday in July? Or that you blink three times whenever you're about to tell a lie? Why would I already have your drink waiting on the wood At the exact right temperature, just the way it should? Must be a coincidence, a glitch inside the store Here's your napkin, Borb, don't let it hit the floor! [Pre-Chorus: Handclaps building] Evan's laughing by the napkins, thinks he's pretty slick Keep on laughing at my customer, I'll boil your drink real quick! Nobody gets to mock you except the girl behind the bar— Now take your lid and move along, Whatever-Who-You-Are! [Chorus: Big catchy dance-punk hook] You're just so unforgettable—wait, I mean FORGETTABLE! Nothing 'bout the way you smile is remotely memorable! Order on the counter for a Riley! A Jamie! Order on the counter for a Chard! A Salami! Pick up your cup, Snorlax! Drink it while it's hot! How could I remember someone that I totally forgot?! [Bridge: Rapid-Fire Name Roll Call, drumline snare build] [Female Vocal, faster and faster] Is it Devon? Is it Dorkin? Is it Dorito? Is it Quinn? Is it Quiche? Is it Mosquito? Is it Hayden? Is it Halibut? Is it Forklift? Is it Bramble? Is it Bingo? Is it Stick-Shift?! Is it Grunk? Is it Plinko? Is it Tambourine?! [Sudden stop - soft music-box chord] [Spoken, quiet deadpan female voice] "...Nice tat? Thanks. The meaning? It's personal." [Final Chorus: Key Change, Full Indie Rock Explosions] You're just so unforgettable—I mean UN-MEMORABLE! Standing at my register looking so adorable—Wait, HORRIBLE! Order on the counter for a Jorbin! A Jorkin! Order on the counter for a Spatula! A Dorkin! See you tomorrow morning at eight-oh-four on the dot— Yeah, you're the sharpest memory that I totally forgot! [Outro: Bassline fades out with an espresso steam blast] [Spoken, deadpan female voice] "Have a day, Gazebo. Next."
