[Intro - spoken word, serious, intense, announcers voice] In the realm of the sweat-drenched gym, Where warriors strive, their visions grim, The battle rages fierce and hot, Each drop a warrior's valiant shot. Yet fear not, for the towel is near, To shield from fate we all revere. [verse] Beneath the weight of iron and steel, The body's strength it must reveal. Yet with each lift and every stride, A river flows, impossible to hide. The threat of change, a dreaded plight, To wrinkle into raisin's sight. [chorus] The warriors groan, the sweat pours free, Each droplet whispers destiny. Yet hope remains, a cloth so pure, Its fibers strong, they must endure. A valiant call, a gentle plea, “Come forth, brave towel, rescue me!” [verse] With noble heart and fabric strong, The towel answers, swift and long. A swath of cotton, soft and true, It swipes the brow, dries morning dew. A shield against the raisin's curse, To battle on, for better or worse. [Bridge] The sweat cascades, relentless force, Yet towel stands, unyielding course. Absorbing torrents, yet still it fights, Turning damp despair to bright delights. Its weave a fortress, holding fast, Until the threat of raisin's past. [solo] [Chorus] The battle waged, the threat has waned, The towel victorious, unrestrained. A hero crowned in gym's grand hall, The savior of the sweat-spurred fall. In gratitude, the warriors bow, To honor the towel, their sacred vow. [Outro - music fades, high hat only, spoken in time and fades out as the words come to an end] Thus ends the epic, a tale of might, Of heroes bold and fabric's fight. Remember, friends, when next you strive, The towel stands, to keep you alive.
