*beep* *its been awhile since we spoken buddy, i trust its all looking good up there you sister has a baby and she wants to say hey (hewwo) haha she is only 3 currently but look you a uncle now, you always wanted to be one and now you are* (verse 1) It hurts it hurts so bad, i wish that i could be there for them even if it meant hell was the place id be going, I spoke to God but i dont know if its back and forth as it feels im putting force in my vocal cords screaming and his turning me off. can anyone hear me if you can then help, as i know i wont help myself out of this hole that i tried to escape dug by myself. give me a second (GIVE ME A SECOND TO THINK) this place is pushing me deeper and deeper into this sinking hole forced to be pink im losing my words my thoughts feel absurd i dont know where i am.. but i feel stuck in my body.. again. *keep on buddy your neice is 12 now just finished 5th grade with flying colours and is showing interest in rapping, aint that what you did? haha she might live up to you* (verse 2) feelings are mutual father and i hope that she does im sorry i aint there but the pain was to much to bear, i didnt have trauma i dont think that i did i made a false accusation to my situation and it put me in a fucked up head space then i tried to twist it manipulate my psychologists didnt go very well as i ended up in the ward with them again. Fucking hell (fast verse incoming) I wish i could put the pen to the pad again find materialistic standing in this domain this place this world they call the demons den im practically infinite in my soul-scape but this hurt is still with me when it doesnt go away i just feel so fucking drifty so doozy im done im schooled with this force its so stupid its abusive there thoughts are in me i cannot comprehend it they taking shots at all of you putting vivid images in my head of death re-incarnated im honestly starting to believe them but i shouldnt its usage is 100% with my brains capacity im short circuiting this bitch so i dont gotta live with them... *beep beep.. its the last day you will be getting a message son.. we have to move on your younger sister is all grown up and has kids of their own moved out older sister is living her life, and im on my death bed cancer is in me son stage 4... i hope to see you soon*
