[Intro - fast jangly guitar and synth, spoken] She picked a build in October and she NEVER looked back. Me? ...I've had nine since Tuesday. [Verse 1 - fast, bouncy] My wife is an Apocalypse, she's steady as the tide, been castin' the same spell since the season's other side, the whole screen goes to fire and the demons start to fry, meanwhile I can't pick a build to save my doggone life! [Pre-Chorus] 'Cause I respec on a Monday, I respec on a Wednesday, I see a shiny new idea and I am gone, hey! I cannot sit still, I cannot commit, new build, who's this? Here we go, here's a hit... [Verse 2 - Auradin, shimmering] First I'm an AURADIN, I'm a holy little sun, I turn the brightness up to ten and blind out everyone, my wife's already glowin' with her apocalypse light, together we're a SUPERNOVA, nuclear and bright! [Chorus - big sing-along, gang vocals] It's LIGHT POLLUTION, baby, we're a double-blazin' star! Can't see a single demon and we can't see where we are! Good thing there's not an obSERVatory left in Sanctuary, 'cause me and my Apocalypse just deleted the whole galaxy! (too bright! too bright!) [Verse 3 - stuttering, evade rhythm] Then I'm an EVADE HAMMERDIN, I blink-blink-blink away, skippin' 'cross the screen like a stone across a bay, flingin' holy hammers while I'm dodgin' through the night, wing strikes and a hop-skip, gone before you aim, alright! [Pre-Chorus] But I respec on a Thursday, I respec on a Friday, I saw a little tooltip and I changed my mind, bye-bye! I cannot sit still, I cannot commit, new build, who's this? Here we go, here's a hit... [Verse 4 - Clash, slow and heavy] Now CLASH is kinda sluggish, Clash is kinda slow, but I socketed a strength gem and I'll have you know: I walk up to a boss, any size, any name, ONE hit. (one hit.) Goodnight. End of game. [Chorus] It's LIGHT POLLUTION, baby, we're a double-blazin' star! Can't see a single demon and we can't see where we are! Good thing there's not an obSERVatory left in Sanctuary, 'cause me and my Apocalypse just deleted the whole galaxy! [Bridge - the ADHD thesis, building] [Vocalist: Female] I have had one build the entire season. [Vocalist: Male] And I have had THIRTY, and I don't need a reason! Auradin, Hammerdin, Clash, and back again, I'm a one-man patch note, I'm a respec machine, and then... (ooh, what's THAT one do?) ...hang on, gimme a sec... [Vocalist: Female] No. No. We are NOT respeccing before the Helltide. Put it DOWN. [Vocalist: Male] ...okay, but after the Helltide... [Final Chorus - biggest] It's LIGHT POLLUTION, baby, turn the whole sky white! She's the slow Apocalypse and I'm the strobe-light knight! She picked one build forever and I pick one a week, but we light up Sanctuary every time we take a peek! (too bright! too bright! too bright!) [Outro - spoken, then tag] She's still Apocalypse. I'm... currently an Auradin. Ask me again in five minutes. (Light pollution!) [End]
