My neighbor got a peacock, he calls him Alan It wanders in my garden, which I don't find very compelling It screams at dawn, a sound from a nightmare's core And last Tuesday it tried to order a pizza through my front door. Oh, Alan the peacock, with your judgmental eyes You strut around my lawn, you're a menace in disguise Your feathers are majestic, a dazzling display But I wish you would just go away. I was trying to have a barbecue with my friend Dave Alan hopped onto the table to misbehave He took a single sausage, with a look of pure disdain And then he flew under the roof to get out of the rain. Oh, Alan the peacock, with your judgmental eyes You strut around my lawn, you're a menace in disguise Your feathers are majestic, a dazzling display But seriously, please go away! My neighbor thinks it’s funny, he says Alan is a "character" And that I should be grateful for the impromptu theater. But yesterday I found Alan sitting in my car He had figured out how to turn on the radio and was listening to a podcast about financial securities. He's just standing there now. Staring at my window. He knows I'm singing about him. I think he likes the attention. This was a mistake.
