[Intro - CB crackle + fiddle kick] Breaker breaker, we got a flip-flop sighting... (come on!) Yeah... y'all know who I'm talkin' 'bout... (ha!) [Verse 1] Well I been from Olathe to Texarkana, Seen lot lizards, lot loons, and lot drama, But there ain't nothin' like that one ol' boy, Every truck stop knows him, every driver annoyed. He pull up in crocs - no - FLIP FLOPS, Lord, DOT flip flops flappin' on a Freightliner board, (flap-flap-flap) He know he wrong, but he wear 'em with pride, Ten toes out in January, just along for the ride. He's Flip Flop Johnny! (Johnny!) Clown car cab, how many's in there? Johnny! (how many?!) Six deep in a single sleeper, where'd y'all come from? (where y'all come from?!) Flip Flop Johnny, fuel island dining, (eatin'!) Shower bag in hand while the line's behind him windin'![Chorus] [Verse 2] Well he park on the fuel island like it's Applebee's, (come on man!) Burger in one hand, FaceTimin' his family, "Driver, you gonna move?" - "Hold on, I'm eatin'!" Ten trucks deep behind him, air brakes squeakin'! (beep! move!) Then he pull up on the CAT scale to take a nap, (on the SCALE?!) Sign say "Pull forward" - he just tip his cap, After weighin' - he park RIGHT THERE on the scale, Log book say "parking spot" - hell naw, that's a FAIL! (hell nah!) He's Flip Flop Johnny! (Johnny!) Hits your mirror, keeps on rollin' - Johnny! (my mirror!) Bushes in the back full of pallets and bologna, (who threw that?!) He dumpin' when he think ain't nobody lookin' - Johnny! (we SEE you!) Flip Flop Johnny, read a sign, my brother! (read it!)[Chorus] [Fiddle Solo - 4 bars + Banjo Roll] (Yee-haw! - flap flap - ooh wee!) [Verse 3 - Bridge Clearance Story] Well he missed the sign sayin' 11-foot-6, (read it, Johnny!) Next thing you know, trailer wearin' bridge bricks, (crunch!) CB light up - "Hey driver, you stuck?" He like "Nah man, I'm custom convertin' to a lowboy truck!" (hah!) He can't read "low clearance" or "no trucks in town", GPS say "turn here" and he just lay it down, Jack-knife in a corn field, flip flops still on, Dispatcher screamin' - "Johnny, where you gone?!" [Final Chorus - Big Live Gang Shout] He's Flip Flop Johnny! (We love ya but HATE ya, Johnny!) Clown car crew spill out like a circus - Johnny! (six of 'em!) Five guys, one truck, one shower ticket, Lord have mercy! (Lord have mercy!) Flip Flop Johnny! Fuel island ain't a diner! (it ain't a diner!) Cat scale ain't a campsite! Bushes ain't a dumpster! He's Flip Flop Johnny - and every trucker knows one! (every trucker knows!) [Outro - CB static + laugh] Yeah this is real life trucker struggle, driver... If you see Johnny - tell him put some boots on! (put some BOOTS on!) And get OFF the fuel island! (10-4! - flap-flap - hahahaha) banjo out with fiddle squeal 
