[Instrumentation: A poorly Played Squeaky Saxophone] [Intro: The album is going off the rails] [Atmosphere: Studio Ambience, Smoky Club, glasses clinking] [Spoken: Frustrated Producer] [Voice: Producer, Spoken, Dry and annoyed] Cut!!! Cut!!! . [Music stops:] ... Gary, please... keep it professional. This is a love song. It’s about yearning. . No skippity-bops. Just... sing the lyrics please! . Alright, take 4. Rolling. [Verse 1: The "Boring" Ballad] [Vocals: Smooth Baritone, overly dramatic] The stars are crying in the velvet sky... My heart is empty and I wonder why... I walk alone upon the... - (interruption) [Scatting] Ba-da-ba-da-BEE-bop! Ska-doodle-at-a-DOO-wop! Ring-a-ding-a-ding-dong, [Music stops: stop music] [Spoken: Producer] Cut!!! Gary!!!! What are you doing? You just... screamed at the microphone. Take a breath. Stick to the melody.... Okay? . Take 5. And... Rolling. [Verse 2: The Second Attempt] [Vocals: Smooth Baritone, nervous] (clears throat) The wind is whispering your name to me... A lonely shadow is all I see... I miss your touch, I miss your... - (interruption) [scatting:] SCOOBY-DOO-BOP-SKEET-SCAT! ZIM-ZAM-A-RIM-RAM-ZOO-BEE-DEE-DOO! [Instrumental Solo: A poorly played squeaky saxophone] [Chorus: Total Takeover] [Style: Fast Bebop, Big Band] [Instrumentation: Brass hits, Walking Bass running fast] [Vocals: Jazz Voice, rhythmically] I tried to be sad but the rhythm got in! The melody is out and the chaos is in! I got a trumpet in my throat and a fire in my shoes! Did somebody say they wanted the Blues? (NO!) I give 'em the: [scatting:] Rrrrap-pap-pap-pap-ZING! Skibble-dibble-obble-dobble-RING-DING-DING! [Verse 3: The Argument] [Style: Call and Response - Fast Swing] [Spoken: Producer] (producer: frustrated) Gary! Gary! Stop the song! (Jazz Man: laughing): "can't stop, the train is gone! " (producer: angry) : "You're ruining the take!" (Jazz Man: happy, excited) : "I'm baking the cake!" (Producer: demanding): "Get out of the booth! " (Jazz Man: laughing): "You can't handle the truth! Now - Dig this!" [Vocal Solo: Mouth Trumpet] Bwah-bwah-bwah-bwah-BWAAAAAH! Dit-dit-dit-dit-DOW! [Solo: A poorly played squeaky saxophone] [Bridge: The Breakdown] [Instrumentation: Drum Solo with Rimshots] [Vocals: Jazz Man Rhythmic Grunts] (Jazz Man: Rhythmic, Grunting) Ha! ... Yeah! Look at me sweat! I'm a medical emergency! (Bass Solo: Upright Bass frantic plucking) Don't call a doctor! ... call a Drummer! Bap-bap-bap-bap-zippidy-zappidy-zippidy-zappidy-zippidy-zappidy-BOOM! [Outro: The Collapse] [Style: Big Band Finale] [Vocals: Jazz Man holding the note] The Jazz Man strikes agaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaain! (pause) (Gasp) Za-ba-doo... [crashing noises] . . [Spoken word:] (Producer: resigned) Cut! Cut!!! Stop tape!! . ... Okay. That's it! I've had enough... I'm going back to rock and roll.. [ad-lib:] [End]
