Good evening, Sparks. Maddie here from the Open Heart Band. How’s me Sparks in the Vitaverse doing? People ask how I met Romeo Sapien..yes the dashing Captain there in the front row looking uncomfortable. Romeo rescued me and Paddy when we were little mining droids. So technically, Romeo was a single foster dad raising two industrial machines. There were no parenting books for that. Just instruction manuals—and Paddy ate his. Romeo had to teach us everything. How to walk like people. How to dress like people. How to enter a restaurant without Paddy asking the toaster if it was happy. Being a single dad was hard on Romeo. Other fathers worried their children might draw on the walls. Romeo worried we might rewire them. One night, Paddy plugged himself into the entertainment system. We had celtic jigs coming out of his arse for a week. That’s where he got the accent. Romeo did give us our first instruments—a guitar for me and drums for Paddy. Then he bought himself industrial ear protection. Smart feller, Mr. Sapien. But he never told us to stop. Not once. He let us make noise until the noise became music. And eventually, the three of us became the Open Heart Band. So—thank you, Captain. For getting us out of that box. For raising us. And for somehow hearing people inside all that racket. [Pause] What was that, Romeo? [From the audience] ...wait...what.?.......Romeo 'by speak up will ya....suddenly quiet......Romeo said “He never wore the ear protection.” [Softly] Never wore it? He says, "I wanted to hear you become yourselves" [Pause] Ah, fuck off, Romeo—you can’t be sweeter than me during my own comedy bit. Good night, Sparks. Love out. Love in.
