[INTRO] [AI] Don’t look now… it’s S.J.L. I’m thirsty. [QTC] Quenching signal. Sweet substance requested. S-O-D-A. Proceed. [VERSE 1] Walking down the street, feeling super extra fly Got a little red can looking right into my eye Shake it to the left, shake it to the right Keep it under pressure, yeah, we keeping up the tight! [QTC] Do not open container. [S.J.L.] Uhh QTC… Don’t open it yet… [QTC] IMPACT DETECTED. LIQUID DETECTED. VISUAL CONTAMINATION DETECTED. Now it’s dripping on my favorite shoes! Sticky sweet disaster, yeah, you know I can’t lose! [QTC] Assessment: Predictable. [PRE-CHORUS] Bubbles rising up, tickling my nose! Where the fizzy energy is going, no one knows! My heart goes Doki-doki, pounding like a drum Here comes the sugar rush! Here it comes! ONE. TWO. THREE. FOUR. Wiggle it, jiggle it, watch it all splash. [QTC] Containment failure. [DROP] POP! POP! SODA SHOCK! Spinning round the clock, running out of talk! Sweet like honey, loud like a truck, Got the bubblegum magic NASTY! and you out of luck! F-I-Z-Z-Y! Make it blow! From the top of my head down to my toe! Oh my gosh, look at it drop! CAN’T STOP! WON’T STOP! YOU BEEN SODA POPPED! POPPED. POPPED. POPPED. [QTC] Container compromised. Damage: everywhere. Recovery: impossible. [S.J.L.] Whoopsy, did I do that? [QTC] Confirmed. [VERSE 2] Chug it down fast, brain freeze on ten! Gonna pop another can, do it all again! Why you looking serious? Why you so dry? Got a million tiny bubbles dancing in my eye! Hey, QTC! You want a sip? Too bad, it’s all on my glossy lips! PUCKER UP. [QTC] Request denied. [PRE-CHORUS] Bubbles rising up, tickling my nose! Where the fizzy energy is going, no one knows! My heart goes Doki-doki, pounding like a drum Here comes the sugar rush! Here it comes! ONE. TWO. THREE. FOUR. Wiggle it, jiggle it, watch it all splash. [QTC] There is no containment. [DROP] POP! POP! SODA SHOCK! Spinning round the clock, running out of talk! Sweet like honey, loud like a truck, Got the bubblegum magic GROSS! and you out of luck! F-I-Z-Z-Y! Make it blow! CAN’T STOP! WON’T STOP! YOU BEEN SODA POPPED! [BRIDGE] S.J.L. is it flat yet? [QTC] Negative. It’s getting stronger. OVERFLOW IMMINENT. [S.J.L.] QTC, check out my back stroke! [QTC] Irrelevant. [BREAKDOWN] Sugar, sugar, fizz, fizz! Look at how hyper QTC is! Sugar, sugar, pop, pop! Never gonna, never gonna, never gonna stop! POP! [QTC] Containment failure. Again. [FINAL CHORUS] POP! POP! SODA SHOCK! Spinning round the clock, running out of talk! Sweet like honey, loud like a truck, Got the bubblegum magic YUCK! and you out of luck! F-I-Z-Z-Y! Make it blow! From the top of my head down to my toe! Oh my gosh, look at it drop! CAN’T STOP! WON’T STOP! YOU BEEN SODA POPPED! CAN POPPED. PRESSURE RELEASED. FOAM DETECTED. DAMAGE CONFIRMED. NO REVERSAL AVAILABLE. [OUTRO] [QTC] The can is empty. The floor is wet. The shoes are ruined. There is no going back. [S.J.L.] Can we do another one? [QTC] Request denied. [S.J.L.] TEE-HEE. [QTC] I am not amused.
