[Begin with 5-15 second instrumental] [Whole song: male bluegrass vocal] Oh Lord, I done slip and slide Even sang this song with a bit o' pride Tried to walk that narrow road Neath your loving goad Passed through dell and wode Til I done slip and slide (straight into yo' fold) But Rememba when? There were times I thought I was done Climbed that avocado tree (what Fun!) Wore my socks (what a crock!) Shoulda taken stock (gone up without sock) But Oh NO! Oh Lord! I done slip and slide Not once but twice, landed Hard! on my pride Thought I was gonna glide (straight into heaven) Glorious Door open wide! (By you I did Abide!) Socks on Did Slip and slide Not once but twice! Heaven's door yawned wide Think I'd a learned To leave the socks (by the rocks) But No! Second time! I did hear heaven chime Socks again! Lengthen this song and rhyme Up on the neighbor's roof Sock still on my hoof Slipped right off and went (OOF!!) Living Proof (avocados and socks are like oil and vinegar) I tried to pick the biggest and best But Oh what a TEST!! And though I am now in Heaven at your Behest Still, I look down with this request Please remind my children to leave their socks Leave their socks (by the rocks) Before they pick the biggest and best So they won't endure The Avocado Test Oh Lord, please hear my request So they don't break the ribs in their chest (like I did) Oh Lord, I tried to lead by example But, in this?, help them, Please! Take care of their Temple [End song with 10-20 second instrumental] [Many thanks to my father for a lifetime of memories that have inspired so many stories. He did indeed fall out of our Avocado tree and broke his ribs and shattered his wrist while trying to pick the Biggest and Best, in his socks no less, and again with socks slid right off the neighbor's roof while trying to pick their avocados for them. The second time he broke his femur. And Yet, my father would work for 50+ years for the post office without ever using one second of sick leave. Truth? They let him use vacation so that he could maintain his record.]
