[Verse 1] There once was a man with a big brown brow Named Bill Bao and he’s from Bilbao He wore three socks and a mango hat And he danced like a jelly on a laundromat mat [Pre-Chorus] He spoke in rhymes, but only to geese Wrote poetry on slices of cheese Rode a unicycle made of flan And swore he once dated a traffic cone named Jan [Chorus] Oh Bill Bao from Bilbao He milks the moon and sings to cows He’s got style, he's got flair Wears a toaster in his underwear Oh Bill Bao, strange but proud Yells “Olé!” way too loud He’s the legend with the crooked toe That’s Bill Bao from Bilbao! [Verse 2] He brews his coffee with tomato juice And calls his mustache “Mother Goose” He once got lost in his own backyard Trying to win a staring contest with a guard [Pre-Chorus] He plays kazoo in a punk mariachi And invented square spaghetti for Versace Carries a ferret named Jean-Paul Le Puff And claims "normal" just ain't weird enough [Chorus] Oh Bill Bao from Bilbao Rides a llama to the local pow-wow He bakes baguettes in a disco ball And slow-dances with a wrecking wall Oh Bill Bao, toast connoisseur Talks to spoons and calls them "sir" He’s the wizard of the washing row That’s Bill Bao from Bilbao! [Bridge – Spoken, with kazoo in background] They say he once proposed to a shoe... And it said yes. But only for tax reasons. [Final Chorus] Oh Bill Bao from Bilbao Has a parrot that only says “Ciao!” He’s the king of the oddly sublime Wears his watch on a lemon-lime Bill Bao, may you never go You're the sparkle in the weirdest show When the world gets dull and slow… We need Bill Bao from Bilbao!
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