[Intro] (God…) I hate that I still know you’re asleep right now 4 AM and I’m staring at the clouds You’re somewhere dreaming, somewhere safe and sound While I’m fighting every thought I never let out I can’t sleep when you sleep so fine… [Verse 1] I been lying here with the covers pulled tight, Watching shadows dance across the bedroom light Your side of the bed still holding your shape, Like my heart forgot that you walked away I deleted your number, I memorized it twice, Funny how goodbye still feels like advice Everybody tells me “girl, you’ll be okay,” But they don’t know the price I had to pay I gave you pieces I never showed before, Opened every locked and guarded door I was your shelter when your world got cold, Held your secrets like they were my own But somewhere between “forever” and “goodbye,” I lost the girl I used to recognize You left so easy, like a page turned over, I stayed trapped underneath the words we wrote You’re sleeping peacefully in another dream, While I’m haunted by what we used to be [Chorus] I can’t sleep ’cause you’re on my mind, 4 AM and I’m losing time Talking to the ceiling like it talks back too, Trying to find the parts I lost in you I can’t breathe when I close my eyes, Every memory comes alive You found your peace, I’m still trying to find How you sleep so good while I’m losing mine [Verse 2] I put on makeup, I smile for the world, Pretend I’m still that unstoppable girl But nobody sees when the door locks shut, The moment I break when I’ve had enough I tried new places, tried new names, Tried convincing myself I’m not the same But every song, every street, every little thing, Still pulls me back to the ghost you bring I don’t miss just the way you held me close, I miss the person I was the most Before I learned how easy it can be, To love someone and lose yourself completely I keep replaying every final fight, Every tear falling in the middle of the night Wondering if I should’ve said less, Wondering if I should’ve loved you less You moved forward like you knew the way, I’m still standing where you walked away And the hardest truth I had to find… Sometimes the person you love Is the reason you’re losing your mind [Chorus] I can’t sleep ’cause you’re on my mind, 4 AM and I’m losing time Heart still racing through the rewind, Chasing pieces you left behind I don’t hate you, I hate that I tried, To keep a love that was already dying You found your peace, I’m still trying to find How you sleep so good while I’m losing mine [Verse 3] Maybe I loved you more than I loved myself, Put my heart on a shelf just to help you heal I was the flame when your world went dark, But you walked away when I needed a spark I would’ve stayed through your darkest days, Through every storm, every mistake I would’ve fought until nothing remained, But you let go before you felt the pain And maybe someday when the night gets cold, You’ll remember the girl who never let go The one who stayed when nobody stayed, The one who loved you through your darkest shades I don’t wish you pain, I don’t wish you blue, I just hope someday you understand too That losing you wasn’t losing love… It was losing the dream I built with us So tonight I’ll stare at the ceiling again, Say goodbye to the ghost I called my friend Maybe tomorrow I’ll finally find A way to sleep without you on my mind [Final Chorus] I can sleep when you’re off my mind, Maybe someday I’ll get my time No more fighting with memories, No more begging for what wasn’t meant to be I’ll heal slowly, I’ll be alright, Even if it takes a thousand nights You found your peace, now I’ll find mine… You sleep so fine… But I’ll be fine. [Outro] (4 AM…) The room is quiet… And for the first time… So am... for the first time… Mmmm, oooooooo.... So am I.
