She Said She'd Get Me Bread

The clock upon the wall says half past three My stomach’s makin’ sounds that frighten me She left around noon, in her Sunday best Said, "Honey, I'm goin' out, put your poor heart at rest." I saw the list, it was taped to the door Pastries, mouse food, buy a little more... Then written in big letters, easy to see: "Get one baguette, for my hungry sweetie." She said she'd get me bread, Lord, she promised me a slice That doughy, glorious, carbohydrate vice. Now my cheese is lonely, my deli meat's in despair, A PB&J without the 'B' is just a sticky, sad affair. I'm starvin' on the sofa, feelin' small and misled, Oh, the cruelest kind of love is the love without the bread! Her truck pulled in, fire engine red My heart beat faster, ready for bread. She walked through the door with a confident air, A bag full of things and not a crumb to share. She’s got a new fern, a magazine, and a leash, A fancy French soap that smells like the beach. But I looked through the bags, I checked 'em all twice, The coffee's still brewin', but the sandwich ain't right! She said she'd get me bread, Lord, she promised me a slice That doughy, glorious, carbohydrate vice. Now my cheese is lonely, my deli meat's in despair, A PB&J without the 'B' is just a sticky, sad affair. I'm starvin' on the sofa, feelin' small and misled, Oh, the cruelest kind of love is the love without the bread! I looked her in the eye, said, "Darlin', where is it, please?" She shook her pretty head with an elegant ease. Said, "The bakery was out, honey, nothin' I could do," "Said they sold the last loaf just before I got through!" Now hold on a minute, that don't sound quite right... That little bakery closes at eight tonight! She's got two dozen donuts and a box of corn flakes... But for a simple baguette, no effort she makes! She’s sittin’ there eatin’ a fresh glazed ring, While I'm just sittin' here, hearin' my hunger sing. I just want one sandwich, toasted golden brown, The saddest man alive in this whole darn town. Tomorrow morning, I know what I'll do, I'll head out myself and get a loaf or two. But tonight, dear woman, you leave me to weep... Over cold cuts and condiments, promises to keep! She said she'd get me bread, Lord, she promised me a slice That doughy, glorious, carbohydrate vice. Now my cheese is lonely, my deli meat's in despair, A PB&J without the 'B' is just a sticky, sad affair. I'm starvin' on the sofa, feelin' small and misled, Oh, the cruelest kind of love is the love without the bread! Yeah, the love without the bread... Just one little piece... Why'd you have to lie about the closing time, Martha? Why?