[Intro | female smoky raspy whisper | latch clicks] I know this handle Why do I know this handle [Door opens | distant radio static] [Verse 1 | female rapper smoky raspy voice | controlled] Palm to the panel I press where the old hidden catch is Thumb finds the dent in the brass through the dust and the scratches Left at the landing I step round the split in the flagstone My feet take the turn like a child being carried back home A kettle keeps hissing there’s crumbs in the sink by the dishes I hear Danny cursing the cutlery something is shifting A crack splits the plaster dust settles across family pictures I brush off a girl in a frame with my own little features [Flow tightens | protective aggression] Bootsteps collect at the junction clipped tactical chatter I whisper turn back and the floorboards reverse with a clatter They rush through an arch and emerge by the rug they just battered I draw out return and the stairs start to carry them backwards His voice from above says come up and I start before thinking My palm finds a fox on the rail with a split in its ear The room at the end has a number I trace without blinking Seventeen under the dust and the voice says I’m here [Hook | female smoky raspy low spoken chant] I know this hall I know this floor I’ve heard that voice through a closing door Seventeen with my hand on the frame Something in here still remembers my name [Verse 2 | female rapper smoky raspy voice | intimate then building] My stepmother Cinder said plague as she pulled on my sleeve He cannot come with us I watched him get lost through the trees The seal on her house kept him out but his voice reached my sleep I learned how to answer in whispers she couldn’t police Her shelter grew stricter restrictions were sold as assistance A visit postponed became years of compulsory distance Seventeen breaks it her thumb pressed the seal on the lintel I counted the cuts in the sill through the frost on the window [Female whispered memory doubles beneath lead] She warned of the fox and the left turn that led to his chamber The more she described it the less I could picture a stranger Your daddy says he’s evil I hear how she phrased it in anger I search for his voice in that memory hers is the only remainder Cold fingers had steadied my hand when the thunder got vicious A mask in the corner kept watch while I hid in the linen He showed me a door in a wall I was sure had no hinges I reach for that seam and the door gives an inch at my fingers [Beat cuts | three knocks then two] [Memory | female smoky raspy whisper] I used to answer that [Two answering knocks | lock releases] [Hook | female smoky raspy low spoken chant] I know this hall I know this floor I’ve heard that voice through a closing door Seventeen with my hand on the frame Something in here still remembers my name [Verse 3 | female rapper smoky raspy voice | urgent then tender] That thing Danny woke at the doorway draws back from my fingers The walls fold away and my bedroom comes out of the splinters My bed by the window the height marks still climb up the wall His chair in the corner the place I would run when he’d call A book by the bed with my crooked first letters in lines I see his cold hand over mine as he teaches me rhymes A date in the margin the year that she took me from here Seventeen circled beneath it a lock of my hair An unfinished sentence a space in the script where I fit in I slip in a clause and the claws in the corridor listen Partition by partition they shift with the pitch that I give them I whisper keep watch and the teeth at the threshold stay hidden The mask turns toward me I know how the man underneath breathes My hand finds his sleeve and the years fall away at the seam Seventeen on the door seventeen when I finally return The room holds its breath as I speak and the lamps slowly burn [Spoken | female smoky raspy voice | fragile | no beat] Dad I remember I’m the princess of Shadowville This is my room I’m home [Violent impact | glass falls | radio static] [Female smoky raspy voice | suddenly firm] Dad I’ll take this door [Handle turns | hard cut]
