[Intro - Spoken over buzzing guitars] Take your seats everyone… Honey, pass out the books… Miss Neilson, what time is it? Still can’t see that damn clock…its not 4:20 yet! [Verse 1] “Take your seats kids please ,” she says with that tired smile “Honey you pass out the textbooks from the cupboard in the back” Who? Me Miss Neilson? Yeah you sweetie, get on track Sonia, sit down, spit that gum out right here in my hand I’m stalling hard, “Miss Neilson, I think the cupboard’s locked.” (Lie through my teeth — Slimer stuffed a dead rat in that box) [Verse 2] Okay, son, I’ll get it… she walks over, turns the key Shhh… shhh… AHHHHH! — dead rat hits the floor, she screams Whole class cracking up, acting like we never seen the thing “Miss Neilson it must’ve crawled in there and died or something” I look at Slimer, grin and say real loud “Ain’t that your pet rat you lost last week, bro? Found!” [Pre-Chorus] She’s pale as paper, hands shaking, “Honey get rid of that thing” “Sure Miss Neilson, no problem” — while me and Slimer scheme [Chorus - Big rowdy gang vocals] Miss Neilson, we don't feel like doing that assignment today. Can you just read to us? This room’s about to blow loose!, better hold on tight ’Cause me and Slimer ’bout to make our own shake and rummble! Jump! Stomp! Slam that wall!— we’ll make the ceiling fall! shhhhhh hay foo remember today is the earthquake drill [Verse 3] “Listen up you guys, surprise earthquake drill today When the bell rings nonstop, drop and cover right away We’re getting timed, every class, they want to know who’s fastest in the school.” Me and Slimer in the back just smiling like two fools Five minutes later she’s passing out those cursed books Bell goes crazy — DRRRRRRRING! — time to make our move [Verse 4] Instead of ducking under desks as we practiced before We start jumping up and down, stomping desks till they roar Whole room shaking, kids laughing, pure bedlam in the back Slimer’s out his seat, heel slamming hard against the wall — CRACK! Big hole in the drywall, dust flying everywhere Slimer yelling “It’s the big one!” with that stupid grin he wears [Bridge - Half-time, heavy chugging riff] Miss Neilson’s screaming “Stop it! This is not the drill!” We’re bouncing like it’s mosh pit, getting our cheap thrill Dead rat, fake quake, backpack nitro yesterday This class is never boring when Luis and Bart leading the way [Guitar Solo - Wild, shaking, chaotic with feedback] [Final Chorus - Even louder, faster] Miss Neilson, may I be excused?! Five minutes early — this school’s about to lose it! Miss Neilson, that ain’t no earthquake, fool That’s Slimer and me making our own damn rules! Jump! Stomp! Slam that wall! Dead rat in the cupboard and a brand new hole! Slimer gets free from a gean visit by promising Miss Neilson to fix the wall himself. Let us out the door! Before the principal comes knocking, we’re gone! [Outro - Shouted, falling apart with noise] Shhh… shhh… AHHHH! Half past monkey’s ass… See you tomorrow Miss Neilson… If the building’s still standing! Yeahhh!
