cheese vs Google June 8 2026

Martin Luther said to laugh at the devil... but this is no laughing matter - I love cheese too much, and you should know... (Verse 1) Woke up this morning, belly full of sharp cheddar cheese Yeah, I woke up this morning, ate a whole block of that cheddar cheese Now my stomach is rumblin’, bringin’ this poor boy to his knees (Verse 2) Tryin’ to write a poem, but the words just smell like decay Lord, I’m writin’ terrible poetry, and the rhymes are all blowin’ away Sittin’ on this porcelain throne, got nothin’ profound left to say (Chorus) Oh, the algorithm’s watchin’, tryin’ to mine my deep mind's gold Yeah, Google's in the server, tryin’ to buy what can't be sold But all you're gettin' is lactose, and a story best left untold Oh Google, you need Jesus, 'cause your matrix is way too cold! (Verse 3) They want my spatial awareness, want my telemetry real neat They want my WASD keystrokes, mapping out a fake 3D street But I’m just passin' gas, makin' the whole dataset incomplete (Verse 4) You can calculate the float, you can track the market cap You can build a billion parameters, catch the whole world in your trap But you can’t digest this gouda, and you ain't got a holy map (Chorus) Oh, the algorithm’s watchin’, tryin’ to mine my deep mind's gold Yeah, Google's in the server, tryin’ to buy what can't be sold But all you're gettin' is lactose, and a story best left untold Oh Google, you need Jesus, 'cause your matrix is way too cold! (Outro) Yeah, you need the Lord, Google... 'Cause you can't code a soul, and you sure can't monetize this mess. I'm just a man... with a bad rhyme... and a worse stomach. And you're just algebra. *(Guitar wails, fades out to the sound of a flushing toilet and the Rainbow Springs river flowing...)*