2. Sit Back, Darling!

# **Sit Back, Darling — The Cabaret Is Open!** *Fidget / Clockwork Cabaret* **[Spoken Intro — over gramophone crackle]** Oh! You actually came! Ha! I told him people would come. He said, *“Fidget, perhaps we should test the electrical system first.”* And I said— ...actually, that's probably why half the lights are flickering. Anyway! Ladies, gentlemen, foxes, ghosts, constructs, questionably sentient machinery, and anything we haven't identified yet— **Welcome to the Clockwork Cabaret!** **[Brass hit — band kicks in]** **[Verse 1]** There's a click in the gears and a knock in the wall, A hundred-year rhythm waking up the hall, Dust off the tables, turn up the light, We've been fixing this beautiful wreck all night! Got brass in the rafters, sparks in the wire, Somebody probably should check that fire— No, no, it's fine! It's supposed to do that! ...I think. Hey, where'd I leave my hat? There's a bass line bouncing underneath the floor, And a glowing little mystery behind that door, But mysteries can wait till tomorrow at noon, 'Cause tonight we're gonna dance to a mechanical tune! **[Pre-Chorus]** So hang your worries with your coat, Leave your troubles at the door, We've had quite enough catastrophes— Tonight we're asking for **more!** **[Chorus]** So sit back, darling, enjoy the show! Let the brass blow high and the good times roll! Kick your boots up, swing your cares away, Welcome, welcome to the Clockwork Cabaret! Come on in, there's a chair right there, Throw your hands up like you just don't care! If the world's gone crazy, well, that's okay— We're going crazy **our** way! Oh! Spin that gear! Pour that cheer! Everybody shout so the Archives hear! Tonight we're alive, And that's reason to say— **WELCOME TO THE CLOCKWORK CABARET!** **[Instrumental Break]** *Trumpet solo — upright bass — clattering gear percussion* **Fidget:** Hey! You in the back! Yes, you! You're thinking too much. Stop it. Dance! **[Verse 2]** We've seen melons with teeth and impossible skies, Books that whisper and machines that tell lies, We've patched up the walls, we've rebuilt the floor, And somehow there's always another locked door. But look at us now with the chandeliers bright, Gold in the gears and the stage lights white, Lumen's glowing, Widget's checking the mains, And the Archivist looks like he's developing pains. He says, *“Please exercise some restraint.”* I say, *“That sounds terribly dull.”* He says, *“At least don't climb the chandelier.”* ... Okay, but in my defense— It looked **extremely climbable.** **[Pre-Chorus]** So forget what waits tomorrow, Let tomorrow wait its turn, Tonight the lamps are glowing, And we've got a dance floor left to burn! **[Chorus]** So sit back, darling, enjoy the show! Let the brass blow high and the good times roll! Kick your boots up, swing your cares away, Welcome, welcome to the Clockwork Cabaret! Come on in, there's a chair right there, Throw your hands up like you just don't care! If the world's gone crazy, well, that's okay— We're going crazy **our** way! Oh! Spin that gear! Pour that cheer! Everybody shout so the Archives hear! Tonight we're alive, And that's reason to say— **WELCOME TO THE CLOCKWORK CABARET!** **[Bridge — music drops to piano + finger snaps]** Maybe tomorrow the alarms start ringing, Maybe something crawls from beneath the floor, Maybe some idiot opens a cursed book— **[beat]** ...again. But not tonight. Tonight there's music. Tonight there are friends. Tonight this old forgotten place Gets to breathe again. And if you've been fighting too long, If you're tired clear through, Pull up a chair. We've saved one for you. **[Soft Build]** You don't have to fix anything tonight. You don't have to fight anything tonight. You don't have to prove anything tonight. Just stay. Listen. Smile. And when the trumpet comes back— **DANCE!** **[Massive brass drop]** **[Final Chorus]** So stand up, darling, you're part of the show! Let the whole room shake and the champagne flow! Grab somebody's hand, let the old gears sway, We're bringing back the Clockwork Cabaret! From the dusty old stage to the neon sign, Every battered little gear is keeping perfect time! We found this place sleeping— Now hear what I say: **WE WOKE UP THE CLOCKWORK CABARET!** Hey! Raise your glass! Stomp your feet! Give those ancient gears a brand-new beat! Let the trumpets scream! Let the whole room sway! We've got nowhere else We need to be today! **[Final refrain — ensemble]** Sit back! *(Sit back!)* Laugh loud! *(Laugh loud!)* Stand up! *(Stand up!)* Make Fidget proud! Leave your troubles outside— They'll still be there someday! But tonight— **Fidget:** Oh, come on, everybody! You know this part! **ALL:** **WELCOME TO THE CLOCKWORK CABARET!** **[Big band ending — gears wind down]** **Fidget, spoken:** See? Nothing exploded. **[distant crash]** ... That was probably already broken. Hit it again!