(Intro - Spoken) Yo… y’all know what time it is… Plug section, baby! Longest part of the damn show… Roll the tape… (Chorus) Here comes the plugs! Here comes the plugs that pay me! Honeysuckle cash flow, ain't no maybe! Talkin’ 'bout plugs… Yeah, the plugs that pay me! Sit tight, this segment’s gonna run past eighty! (Verse 1) Started with a guest spot, one little show, Long Road to Ruin, just fillin' a row. "Can I come back?" — she slid in my DMs, Source Material callin’ — “Hey, I’m free again!” Mockingbird reviewed, “Feminist Agenda” ride, Then she hit TVPT, DYH, real wide. Did I ask? Hell no — that invite was hers, But now she’s crackin’ jokes like she earned her a purse! (Pre-Chorus) “You gonna pay me?” — girl, are you high? This gig barely pays for the Wi-Fi. It’s cute the first time, then it gets rough, Kept smilin’ sweet while I’d had enough. Told ya to chill, but the bit rolled on, Until I snapped back — now the jokes are gone. But yeah, she coined it, I’ll give her the line… So here’s your flowers, and now it’s plug time! (Chorus) Here comes the plugs! Here comes the plugs that pay me! Honeysuckle hustle, craft so wavy! Talkin’ 'bout plugs… Yeah, the plugs that pay me! Whole damn outro like a second show, baby! (Bridge - Spoken) Look, I just wanna say thanks to the guests, But if your plugs take longer than the review— We got a problem. (Verse 2) “Two minutes tops” — yeah, that’s what they swear, Fifteen deep, we still stuck in that chair. Books, bands, side gigs, "wait, one more thing!" Suddenly we’re talkin’ wrestling and bling. It’s the Wild West, I just gave up tryin’, Plugs so long, sponsors stop buyin’! Chaos reigns, my patience is thin, But hey, that’s podcast life — let’s plug it again! (Final Chorus) Here comes the plugs! Here comes the plugs that pay me! Plug section longer than Scorsese! Talkin’ 'bout plugs… Yeah, the plugs that pay me! End of the show? Nah, sit down, maybe! (Outro - Spoken) That’s it… that’s the plugs… Support the artists, buy the merch, tip your host. But if you wanna get paid? First… check whose idea it was for you to be here. Peace.
