[radio pitch warm-up] "See the USA in your Chevrolet, Chevrolet..." "Start your morning the Wheaties way, Wheaties way..." "When you’re out of Schlitz, you’re out of beer, out of beer..." "Keep your pencils sharp and your conscience clear, conscience clear..." [Nostalgic chime sting] "Pepsi hits the spot every time, every time..." "Trust your car to the man who wears the Texaco sign, Texaco sign..." "Brusha brusha brusha with Ipana smile, Ipana smile..." "Let 'er rip with Lipton style, Lipton style..." [vinyl scuff loop] "Double your pleasure with Doublemint gum, Doublemint gum..." "Put a tiger in your tank, make the suburbs hum, suburbs hum..." "A little dab’ll do ya with Brylcreem slick, Brylcreem slick..." "New Blue Bonnet tastes just like a trick, just like a trick..." [tape warble modulation] "Nabisco, the name to know, name to know..." "Play Texaco Star Theatre, let the laughter flow, laughter flow..." "Reach for a Lucky instead of a sweet, instead of a sweet..." "Give your feet that Dr. Scholl’s beat, Scholl’s beat..." [sub bass pulse from commercial jingle] "Milk—it does a body good, body good..." "Better living through chemistry, just as it should, as it should..." "Mars gives you energy to go, go, go, go, go, go..." "And Ajax makes your bathtub glow, bathtub glow..." [vinyl scuff loop reprise] "Melts in your mouth, not in your hands, not in your hands..." (M&Ms echo) "I'd walk a mile for a Camel, mile for a Camel..." "Snap! Crackle! Pop! Rice Krispies top, Krispies top..." "They're gr-r-reat! Frosted Flakes fate, Flakes fate..." [Nostalgic chime sting build-up] "Good to the last drop, Maxwell House hop, House hop..." "Fly the friendly skies, United prize, skies prize..." "You deserve a break today at McDonald's way, McDonald's way..." "Have it your way at Burger King play, King play..." [sub bass pulse crescendo] "Plop, plop, fizz, fizz, Alka-Seltzer whiz, Seltzer whiz..." "The quicker picker-upper, Bounty supper, picker-upper..." "Finger-lickin' good, KFC mood, lickin' good..." "I'm lovin' it, McDonald's hit, lovin' it..." [outro fade with slogan fragments exploding] "See the USA... Chevrolet... Wheaties way... Out of beer... Conscience clear... Hits the spot... Texaco sign... Brusha brusha... Lipton style... Doublemint gum... Tiger tank... Brylcreem slick... Blue Bonnet trick... Name to know... Laughter flow... Lucky sweet... Scholl’s beat... Body good... Chemistry should... Go, go, go... Bathtub glow... Mouth not hands... Mile for Camel... Snap Crackle Pop... Gr-r-reat... Last drop... Friendly skies... Break today... Have it your way... Plop fizz... Picker-upper... Lickin' good... Lovin' it... FIRE!"
