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殻 (Shell) #和ロック

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V5

石灰化した祈祷が  此処では唯一の法 体温を断った  無菌室の遊戯 「お生憎様」と 指先でなぞる境界線 酸素は疾うに  枯渇いている ​ 敲く音 鼓膜を嬲る 安全地帯 剥落してゆく ねえ、此処から出して ……否、此処で殺して 剥き出しの自我を この殻が護り抜いてきた 鮮やかすぎる浮世を 呪って嗤った 鋭利な孤独を もっと奥まで突き刺して 壊れるくらいなら  いっそ己が僕を殺して 白く塗りつぶした  未完の脱皮 石灰化した迷路の奥 神経が壁と癒着して もうどこまでが僕で どこからが拒絶だろう 脈打つ雑音 模造品の空 呼吸の仕方を 忘れていく 光の粒子が 網膜を焼く 解けていく境界線 痛みさえ愛おしい ねえ、壊していいよ まだ、触れないで この「殻」が僕の 唯一の皮膚になってしまったんだ 眩しすぎる未来を  呪いながら祈った 剥がれ落ちる嘘を  もっと激しく掻き乱して 消えてしまうくらいなら  いっそ 君に壊されて 赤く滲んでゆく  拒絶の向こう側 (さあ、壊して...) ひび割れた視界 崩落する自尊心 境界線が溶け出して 混ざり合って 隠し持った刃で 自分を刻んでも 溢れ出したのは嘘じゃない 僕の温度だ! 剥き出しの自我を この殻が守っていたんだ 鮮やかすぎる世界を 拒絶して嗤った でも鋭利な孤独を もっと深く突き刺して 壊れるくらいなら いっそ 君と壊れたい 白く塗りつぶした 世界の真ん中で 僕が僕に 初めて触れた ​ 殻の破片が 綺羅綺羅と降り積もる 痛いよ でも、眩しいんだ... [[English]] Calcified incantations The only decree that rules this space A game played in a sterile void Where body heat is cut away "My deepest apologies," I sneer Tracing the border with a fingertip The oxygen here has long since Bled dry ​ The knocking sound ravishes my eardrums My sanctuary begins to flake away "Please, let me out of here" ...No, "Slaughter me right here" ​ This shell has guarded to the bitter end The raw, naked self screaming inside Laughing as I cursed the floating world A reality far too vivid to bear ​Drive this piercing loneliness Deeper into the core of my soul If I’m to break, I’d rather Be the one to kill the "me" I serve A molting left unfinished Smeared in a coat of white ​ Deep within this calcified maze My nerves have fused into the walls Where does the "I" end? And where does the "rejection" begin? A pulse of static noise Under a counterfeit sky I’m losing the memory Of how to breathe ​ Particles of light Scorch my retinas The boundaries are dissolving now Even this pain feels like love "Go ahead, break me down" ...Wait, "Don’t touch me yet" ​ This "Shell" has become My one and only skin Praying as I cursed the future A light far too blinding to see ​Scrape away the peeling lies With a violence I’ve never known If I’m to vanish, I’d rather Be shattered into pieces by you Seeping into a crimson stain On the far side of rejection ​(Come on, break it...) ​ A vision fractured into shards Pride in a state of freefall The borders melt and hemorrhage Bleeding into one another Even if I carve into myself With the blade I’ve kept concealed What overflows is no lie It’s the warmth of my own blood! ​ This shell has guarded to the bitter end The raw, naked self screaming inside Mocking the world for being too bright I turned my back and laughed But drive this piercing loneliness Deeper, deeper than before ​ If I’m to break, I’d rather Be shattered into pieces WITH you In the center of this world I painted over in white For the very first time I finally touched the real me Shards of the shell Falling and piling up like glittering snow It hurts. But it’s so... blindingly bright.