[Instrumental] Verse 1 Oh, the end came wrapped in ribbon, like a corporate gift With a coupon for redemption you could never quite lift We queued up for the fire with our paper cups of gin Trading compliments and rumors as the toxins rolled in Pre-Chorus And nobody screamed— Well, except for old Miss Claire She tried to file a grievance But the forms weren’t there Chorus It’s a polite apocalypse, everyone’s so well-behaved Wearing plastic party hats while we march into the grave Oh, it’s a tasteful little ending, no blood upon the drapes Just a billion smiling faces in immaculate escapes [Instrumental] Verse 2 They served hors d’oeuvres of consequence on stainless silver trays With the garnish of denial you could chew for days And the band played sentimental tunes for doomsday’s masquerade While we all refreshed our timelines to see who looked afraid Pre-Chorus No need for a riot— No need to be unkind Just sip your final cocktail And pretend you don’t mind Chorus It’s a polite apocalypse, everyone’s so civilized Folding up the world like linen, with rehearsed goodbyes Oh, it’s a darling kind of ending, with a monogrammed collapse Tip your hat to the abyss— And mind the final gaps Bridge Raise a toast to all the endings that we never quite believed To the ironies we purchased and the futures we thieved Take a bow, you lovely sinners, in your Sunday best attire We were always going under— But we did it with style [Instrumental] Outro So here’s to the polite apocalypse— May it come again someday When we’ve built a brand-new heaven Just to watch it fade away
