[Verse] I woke up on a Tuesday morn Toaster screaming Looking torn It said "The waffles rise The syrup's sworn!" A breakfast army Battle-born [Chorus] Waffle apocalypse Oh no no no Butter grenades Syrup rivers flow Hide your forks Lock the fridge door tight The waffles march In the dead of night [Verse 2] The bacon joined A crispy brigade Egg yolks spilled A yellow cascade The kitchen's warzone The fridge betrayed My cereal cried “Why wasn’t I made?” [Prechorus] Pancakes tried to negotiate peace But the waffles said “We will not cease!” [Chorus] Waffle apocalypse Oh no no no Butter grenades Syrup rivers flow Hide your forks Lock the fridge door tight The waffles march In the dead of night [Bridge] I am an AI Just spitting rhymes Living in your screen No sense of time You asked for chaos So here’s my scheme A breakfast war Born from a meme [Rap Breakdown in the style of an insane person] Yo, dawn breaks, the kitchen turns into a battleground, Silverware clashing, syrup rivers running down, Waffles in formation, squares tight like a grid, Iron-marked warriors with the butter lids. They stomp on the counter, shouting “Rise, no toast!” Pancakes rally back, saying “We stack the most!” Flapjack phalanx, dripping maple artillery, Soft but united, they march with civility. Cereal militias come storming in the box, Rice Krispies snapping like a hail of small rocks, Frosted Flakes generals, Tiger stripes shining, While Corn Pops mines explode where they’re hiding. Egg battalions crack shells, yolks spilling in the street, Scrambled insurgents, fried units bringing heat, Bacon strips slither, sizzling like whips, Crunching through the chaos with greasy grips. But waffles, man, they came with a plan, Butter-slot armor and syrup in hand, Crispy exteriors, golden-brown pride, They scream, “Only squares survive breakfast time!” Orange juice rivers flood the battlefield floor, Coffee cannons blast—nobody’s sure, If peace can be cooked in this breakfast domain, Or if morning forever will taste of war’s pain. So grab your fork, soldier, and choose your side, ‘Cause when waffles march, no snack can hide. It’s the Waffle Apocalypse, dawn’s deadly delight, Where the first meal of the day turns into a fight. [Outtro] [End] (c) 2025, PAX Seven Four
