[Verse 1] Pickle sat proud on the couch tonight, Bagman beside her in the camera light, Big ol’ body, tiny legs below, She said, “How do those little things go?” She flexed once and the room went still, Biceps built like a comedy drill, Bagman blinked and tried to grin, Pickle said, “This is where we begin.” [Chorus] Pickle laughed and pointed down, “Tiny legs on the couch-side clown, My arms are bigger than your whole plan, What happened to you, Bagman?” Buzz buzz buzz, the clippers ran, Hair fell fast from the head of the man, Pickle said, “Hold still instead, There’s a dent hiding in your head.” [Verse 2] The bald spot shined in the studio glow, Pickle leaned close and said, “Oh no, That ain’t a forehead, that’s a map, Who put a pothole under your cap?” Bagman tried to cover the scene, She said, “No chance, let the people glean, You came in fuzzy, proud, and fed, Now you’re bald with a souvenir head.” [Chorus] Pickle laughed and pointed down, “Tiny legs on the couch-side clown, My arms are bigger than your whole plan, What happened to you, Bagman?” Buzz buzz buzz, the clippers ran, Hair fell fast from the head of the man, Pickle said, “Hold still instead, There’s a dent hiding in your head.” [Bridge] Side by side and the chat went wild, Pickle grinned with a winner’s smile, “Stand up, wait, don’t even try, Those little legs need time to comply.” [Final Chorus] Pickle laughed and claimed the room, Bagman bald in the lamp-lit gloom, Tiny legs and a dented crown, She said, “That’s why I had to write it down.” Buzz buzz buzz, the joke was said, Biceps big and a shiny head, Pickle waved as the camera panned, “Bless your heart, little Bagman.”
