Don’t Cross The Streams

Underground rap, retro sampling, underground hip-hop, ‑Singing, ‑jazz

[Intro – static crackle, fake voiceover]
[Deadpan announcer voice]
“Coming soon to a platform you don’t subscribe to…
unless you borrow your cousin’s password.”

[Beat Drops]

[Hook 1]
Don’t cross the streams—nah, keep ‘em apart,
Season one’s on Prime, and two’s a la carte.
Three’s on a service from a brand you ain’t heard,
Four got scrubbed for a reboot no one preferred.

[Verse 1]
The movies on Peacock! Too bad it’s worthless. 
you can only see it when subbed to it’s premium service
Netflix raised the price again, wow great decision 
To fund their producers original vision

They sold us the dream—any show on demand
Now you need to search for any show worth a damn. 
You got four episodes here, the rest is overseas,
Better learn to torrent or VPN for your needs

[Hook 2]
Don’t cross the streams—every platform’s a trap,
Bait you with convenience, then sell you pure crap.
They’ll raise up the rate on every third month,
And you’ll never know when your show will get dumped.

[Verse 2]
Disney+  buying up every contract that they can 
More princesses than people in Greenland
Throwing out so many Star Wars and Marvel shows
With stories so watered down they’re like a garden hose

South Park’s playin’ tag between Paramount and Max,
Double-dippin’ deals while the season been halved.
Your favorite show? It’s split like custody rights,
Half on Hulu, half on Max, and canceled overnight.

[Bridge – sarcastic AI narrator, TV static)
“This program was deleted to make space…
For 5 more original shows!.”

[Verse 3]
Talented writers get dumped in the pit,
So suits can resell the same old shit.
They greenlight dumb shit, raise rates when it tanks—
CEO’s laughing all the way to the banks.

Hey, this service charged me twice at the same time!
Because you subbed to it once and then again through prime
We all cut the cable because we wanted to quit it
But got tangled in the cord and hung ourselves with it

[Final Hook – layered vocals, fading out like a broken stream]
Don’t cross the streams—don’t try to make sense,
More expensive than cable, six times as “immense.”
Now there’s 100 different choices you gotta juggle,
Time to “Sail the High Seas”, this ain’t worth the struggle.

(Buffering… buffering… stream failed.)

[End]

2241/7500

[Intro – static crackle, fake voiceover] [Deadpan announcer voice] “Coming soon to a platform you don’t subscribe to… unless you borrow your cousin’s password.” [Beat Drops] [Hook 1] Don’t cross the streams—nah, keep ‘em apart, Season one’s on Prime, and two’s a la carte. Three’s on a service from a brand you ain’t heard, Four got scrubbed for a reboot no one preferred. [Verse 1] The movies on Peacock! Too bad it’s worthless. you can only see it when subbed to it’s premium service Netflix raised the price again, wow great decision To fund their producers original vision They sold us the dream—any show on demand Now you need to search for any show worth a damn. You got four episodes here, the rest is overseas, Better learn to torrent or VPN for your needs [Hook 2] Don’t cross the streams—every platform’s a trap, Bait you with convenience, then sell you pure crap. They’ll raise up the rate on every third month, And you’ll never know when your show will get dumped. [Verse 2] Disney+ buying up every contract that they can More princesses than people in Greenland Throwing out so many Star Wars and Marvel shows With stories so watered down they’re like a garden hose South Park’s playin’ tag between Paramount and Max, Double-dippin’ deals while the season been halved. Your favorite show? It’s split like custody rights, Half on Hulu, half on Max, and canceled overnight. [Bridge – sarcastic AI narrator, TV static) “This program was deleted to make space… For 5 more original shows!.” [Verse 3] Talented writers get dumped in the pit, So suits can resell the same old shit. They greenlight dumb shit, raise rates when it tanks— CEO’s laughing all the way to the banks. Hey, this service charged me twice at the same time! Because you subbed to it once and then again through prime We all cut the cable because we wanted to quit it But got tangled in the cord and hung ourselves with it [Final Hook – layered vocals, fading out like a broken stream] Don’t cross the streams—don’t try to make sense, More expensive than cable, six times as “immense.” Now there’s 100 different choices you gotta juggle, Time to “Sail the High Seas”, this ain’t worth the struggle. (Buffering… buffering… stream failed.) [End]

0/500