Amor Fati - (Fades2Red)

[Verse 1] I caught my own reflection and didn’t look away this time same tired mouth, same borrowed face same war behind the eyes I used to pray for cleaner hands like guilt would rinse out in the rain but every door I swore I closed still knew me by my name I kept trying to cut the past like decay out of a tree but the blade kept finding bone and the bone was always me [Pre-Chorus] So let it come back ugly let it come back real I’m done asking which wound was the one that taught me to feel [Chorus] I let the ruin happen, sat inside the fade missed a home I never had, in a time that wasn’t made I was the wrong-shaped piece, still cutting up the frame then I leaned into the void and heard my own voice underneath I broke my hands on things I couldn’t change tried to crawl back through the years to where you looked at me the same but nothing can be stripped from what already learned to bleed so I’d take the whole road over if it still brings me to me [Verse 2] There are years I only kept because I hated them so well held them under my tongue until they learned my mouth I made a god of leaving then blamed the empty room like I wasn’t the one kneeling with a match and calling it proof But I can’t curse the wreckage without cursing what survived and I won’t make a stranger out of who kept me alive [Pre-Chorus] So let it wear my fingerprints let it speak with my mouth I was not dragged through nothing I was dragged into myself [Chorus] I let the ruin happen, sat inside the fade missed a home I never had, in a time that wasn’t made I was the wrong-shaped piece, still cutting up the frame then I leaned into the void and heard my own voice underneath I broke my hands on things I couldn’t change tried to crawl back through the years to where you looked at me the same but nothing can be stripped from what already learned to bleed so I’d take the whole road over if it still brings me to me [Bridge] Even the shame even the years I disappeared inside myself even the love that came too late even the words I should have said Even the boy I buried just to call myself a man even the hand that shook when I reached back for his hand I won’t cut him out I won’t call him weak if he had to crawl through hell then hell belongs to me [Final Chorus] I let the ruin happen, sat inside the fade missed a home I never had, in a time that wasn’t made I was the wrong-shaped piece, still cutting up the frame then I leaned into the void and heard my own voice underneath I broke my hands on things I couldn’t change tried to crawl back through the years to where you looked at me the same I wasn’t spared from the love or saved from the grief I’d take the whole road over if it still brings me to me [Outro] Bring me to me with the dirt still on my knees bring me to me not clean, not free Bring me to me every scar, every plea I’d take the whole road over if it still brings me to me