[Intro — soft slack-key guitar, ocean waves, breath] [Verse 1] You showed up at my door with two little girls And a story stitched together out of borrowed pearls I opened up my table, I opened up my name I never opened up my body — but you claimed it just the same You called me sovereignty wife in a language I was born to Told your mother's mother that we said our vows in blue Told the children I was mama, told the world I was your bride Coco was a costume, and you wore me like a lie [Pre-Chorus] But my mother made me out of red soil and salt My father made me honest — that was never his fault I loved those little girls, that part was always true I just never, not for one breath, was ever in love with you [Chorus] Aloha, not goodbye I still love you as a human, I just won't love you as mine You can keep the story you told them, I'll keep the truth I lived I'll keep the poem I wrote before I knew, the one that already forgave Aloha, not goodbye May you find the man beneath the mask before you die I hope you learn to sit with what you've done I'll be over here — a mother, a daughter, a chosen one [Verse 2 — brushed drums enter softly] Three women picked up the phone and every one of them cried Different cities, different decades, all the same alibi Less than ten percent, one of them said The rest was smoke and a script inside your head You told them Zoey was yours, my baby, my star Conceived in a clinic by a woman who knew who she was You took my one miscarriage, the twins I lost in fifteen And you dressed them in your name like they were part of your dream [Pre-Chorus] But my grief is not a costume for a man who won't grieve My babies are not props for a story you weave My daughter has one mother and her name is written down And it isn't yours, it never was, it never will be found [Chorus] Aloha, not goodbye I still love you as a human, I just won't love you as mine You can keep the tv and the smoker, I'll keep my Pacific spine I'll keep the daughter that I made without a single lie Aloha, not goodbye May the mirror finally catch you when you try to slide I hope you tell one true thing before your time is done I'll be over here — the lesson that came before the love [Bridge — vocals climb, guitar swells, drums lift] You said I'm a bitch because I finally have boundaries You said I didn't love you — no, I didn't worship There's a difference baby that you'll spend your life learning The women who see through you are the ones you should be earning You said enjoy the tv like the tv was the point Like I stayed for furniture and not for the anointing Of a family, of two babies with your face I never wanted your things — I wanted you in place But you were never in place You were never in place You were never in place, my love You were never in place [Final Chorus — slower, quieter, more space, harmonies bloom] Aloha, not goodbye I still love you as a human, that's the mother in my eye I'll pray for you at sunset, I'll pray for you at dawn I'll pray for you the way you never prayed for anyone Aloha, not goodbye May the ancestors you claimed but never earned show you why I am my mother's daughter, made of storm and sun And I was never yours to lose I was only ever my own [Outro — spoken, whispered over ukulele fingerpicking and waves] My aloha is real My boundaries are real My poem was right the first time Aloha not goodbye
