I’m getting old to be this feckless Tongue-tied, stone-faced, out of step Skimming sins like flat black pebbles Trying hard to look unkept Better cover up my veins until it’s time For the show to start, for the knives to dim And I study all their easy grins Like a map I’ll never fit inside I keep folding up my brittle skin Hoping it will learn to lie I’ll try to wear your weather Like a borrowed coat Smile through the splintered seams And call it hope I could blend into the curtain A painted, breathing shade Waving at the pretty thunder Till it knows my name I’ve got a lingering suspicion They can smell that I’m a liar Like rain trapped in a closed-up cellar Or a match that refuses fire I’m too soft and I’m too weak I can’t change the things they think But I practice every day to bend my face Into something they might keep And I line my pockets with the parts That only you could almost love Try to patch a paper heart With the shine from up above I’ll try to wear your weather Like a borrowed coat Smile through the splintered seams And call it hope I could blend into the curtain A painted, breathing shade Waving at the pretty thunder Till it knows my name
