[Spoken Intro] So something was shown to me and I thought… “Well, shit.” The call went out… And like the lady I am… Well, FUCK! I just came to the party. This is for you, Vickie! [Verse 1] Before I became a badass, I followed the rules Before I gave a fuck what others thought, I was a fool But I’ve been burned, I’ve been torn And I knew one day I’d be me — felt it since I was born [Verse 2] These pretty girls walk into my bar Thinkin’ they’re all that, like they’ve made it real far They come over to me, order their frilly little drinks Fuck’s sake, ladies, that perfume really stinks They look at me like I’m four ways from Friday I look right back like, “Bitch, pick a better place to play” [Verse 3] They say, “You have no idea what we’re wearing” I say, “Are you fuckin’ serious? Bitch, you smell like a skunk” She looks at me like I slapped her in the face “You’re as stupid as you look — you’re not welcome in my place” [Verse 4] She calls over a brick shit house — what a sight He walks over and says, “Is there a problem tonight?” I say, “If you want answers, honey, you’re barking up the wrong fuckin’ tree” He says, “Why’s that?” I grin and say, “Because, cowboy… I’m a fuckin’ bronco ride you’ve never survived.” [Verse 5] He says, “Is that so?” I say, “Oh, it sure as fuck is.” “These fuckin’ bitches called you over? Well, now you’re in my business.” “Get down on your hands and knees, ’Cause now you’re my bitch.” “I’m gonna fuck you up — And not in the fun kind of way.” “Your tongue might still be useful, So shut the fuck up and stay outta my way.” [Verse 6] So these bitches think they’re all that Fuck ’em — Twinkie-eatin’ motherfuckers, talkin’ all that crap But me? I’m everything — the real fuckin’ deal You better have a spine if you’re lookin’ for a thrill I’ve got no time for bullshit And definitely no time to waste You walked into my bar lookin’ for a fight… Well, congratulations, sweetheart. You found the place. [Outro] You wanted the gauntlet? Come and run it.
