I ate way too much cheese Now I’m down upon my knees That’s what my colon says, mm-mm That’s what my colon says, mm-mm I had ten bran muffins Now I’m huffin’ and puffin’ At least that’s what the plumber says, mm-mm That’s what the plumber says, mm-mm But I keep strainin' All my pipes are complainin' It’s like I got this blockage in my mind Saying, "It’s gonna be just fine!" 'Cause the squeezers gonna squeeze, squeeze, squeeze, squeeze, squeeze And the knees are gonna freeze, freeze, freeze, freeze, freeze Baby, I’m just gonna wheeze, wheeze, wheeze, wheeze, wheeze I squeeze it out, I squeeze it out [Vocalizing: Yodel-ay-hee-hoo!] The rhymes are gonna bake, bake, bake, bake, bake In another Taylor remake, make, make, make, make Baby, I’m just gonna quake, quake, quake, quake, quake I squeeze it out, I squeeze it out I never miss a dose Metamucil is gross And that’s what the public sees, mm-mm (Eww disgusting!!) That’s what the public sees, mm-mm I’m writing songs on the throne 'Bout every ex that I’ve known And that’s how I get my fees, mm-mm [Instrumental: Cash register sound effect] That’s how I get my fees, mm-mm But I keep pushin' Need a velvet-lined cushion It’s like I got this lyric in my mind Saying, "It’s gonna be just fine!" [Instrumental: Duck call honk] 'Cause the squeezers gonna squeeze, squeeze, squeeze, squeeze, squeeze And the knees are gonna freeze, freeze, freeze, freeze, freeze Baby, I’m just gonna wheeze, wheeze, wheeze, wheeze, wheeze I squeeze it out, I squeeze it out [Vocalizing: Yodel-ay-hee-hoo!] My intestines gonna ache, ache, ache, ache, ache For a double-layer cake, cake, cake, cake, cake Baby, I’m just gonna quake, quake, quake, quake, quake I squeeze it out, I squeeze it out Hey, hey, hey! Just think, while you’ve been getting down and out about the liars And the greasy, greasy pizzas of the world... You could’ve been getting down to this... sick seat! [Instrumental: Loud toilet flush sound effect] My large intestine brought a brand-new friend She’s like, "Oh my God, is that a record deal?" And to the fella over there with the bran muffin hair Won't you come on over, baby? We can... 'Cause the squeezers gonna squeeze, squeeze, squeeze, squeeze, squeeze And the knees are gonna freeze, freeze, freeze, freeze, freeze Baby, I’m just gonna wheeze, wheeze, wheeze, wheeze, wheeze I squeeze it out, I squeeze it out The fans are gonna take, take, take, take, take Whatever parody I make, make, make, make, make Baby, I’m just gonna quake, quake, quake, quake, quake I squeeze it out, I squeeze it out I squeeze it out, I squeeze it out I, I, I squeeze it out, I squeeze it out "I think I’m seeing stars!" I, I, I squeeze it out, I squeeze it out "Wait, was that a Lego?" I, I, I squeeze it out, I squeeze it out
