[Intro — Spoken] I only wanted a little help with my love life. She gave me a bottle with a skull on it. In hindsight… That should’ve been a warning. [Verse 1] I found an old shop at the end of the street, Black candles burning and a sign that read, “LOVE, LUCK, CURSES — CHEAP.” There was a witch with a raven on her chair, Silver in her eyes and smoke in her hair. She took one look at my lonely heart, Then laughed and said, “Boy, I know where to start.” She pulled down a bottle covered in dust, Said, “One little sip and they’ll fall in lust.” The label was crooked, the liquid glowed green— [Spoken] I said, “Is this safe?” She said, “Define safe.” [Chorus] Midnight Potion Number Thirteen, Bubbling purple, glowing green, One little sip underneath the moon And every monster in the room wants you. Midnight Potion Number Thirteen, Strongest damn thing I’ve ever seen, Witches warned me, but I drank it anyway— Now every handsome creature’s looking my way! [Verse 2] First came a vampire dressed all in black, He flashed those fangs and I kissed him back. Then a werewolf winked from across the room— [Spoken] Okay. He was very convincing under the full moon. A ghost blew a kiss straight through the wall, Some horned demon asked me to dance in the hall. By twelve-fifteen I finally knew— That witch made this stuff A little too good. [Chorus] Midnight Potion Number Thirteen, Bubbling purple, glowing green, One little sip underneath the moon And every monster in the room wants you. Midnight Potion Number Thirteen, Something wicked, something sweet, I tried to hide, but there’s nowhere to go— When Frankenstein’s knocking at your window! [Spoken] No. Absolutely not. You’re lovely, Frank. It’s just… complicated. [Bridge — Spooky Breakdown] The bottle started shaking, The cork went flying high, Purple smoke filled up the room And spelled my name across the sky. The witch came running through the door, Took one look and screamed— [Spoken — Witch] “YOU DRANK THE WHOLE THING?!” [Spoken] …Was I not supposed to? [BUILD] Now the graveyard’s waking, The church bells chime, Every creature’s forming A single-file line! [High Note] WHAT THE HELL WAS IN NUMBER THIRTEEEEEEN?! [Final Chorus] Midnight Potion Number Thirteen, Craziest Halloween I’ve ever seen, Vampires, werewolves, ghosts in line, Apparently tonight they’re all my type! Midnight Potion Number Thirteen, Next Halloween, you know where I’ll be— Back at that shop underneath the moon… [Spoken] Excuse me, ma’am? Do you happen to have… Number Fourteen? [Outro] Bubble, bubble, Pour it clean… Never underestimate Number Thirteen.
